Virtual Ministry Archive

Showing posts with label buddhist monastery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label buddhist monastery. Show all posts

Chewing Gum for Felines





So many distractions, a world rife with illusion, and to elude you from what? Well the fact that you are here for an unfathomable amount of time, even a day to some is almost insurmountable. As well, for each and every one of us, death looms. How any sort of joviality can be construed with such a reality is beyond me, but thankfully we have alcohol, drugs, music, pets, food, love, beauty, nature, travel, etc to keep our minds off our impending doom.
And truth is, death is not a finality, we keep living on and on for millennia after this life, what escapes me is why we don’t have a conscious understanding of the process of rebirth and existence as a whole. If we had such an understanding we would dare not make the same mistakes and only grow infinitely.
The process of life includes living with suffering, illusion, mystery, and to live through the process of old age hence losing our youth-which most of us use to our benefit, to land a rich and powerful mate and those that don’t make the cut actually have to make it on our own.
I have always seen my inherent humanity as an alien existence, it is one thing to look at oneself as gender confusion but to look at oneself as being an alien being in a human body and thinking to yourself, jeeze I guess I have facial worms like 98% of humanity lol
I think that those that aren’t living their life in service to another in some way or some fashion is definitely missing out on the true pleasure of existence, serving somebody continuously, serving some disciples in spiritual direction, helping others, helping a loved one live their life a hell of a lot easier is one of the most honorable existences.
So many take, and take, and just chart their way through life.
I would like to be an example for somebody that makes 150k a year and they get to their endpoint and they say “look at this guy, Shaun- he made 90% less than you and he gave to countless charities whenever he could. You have bought nothing but gold bars and platinum rings, you get another go around”
I have always served animals in the past decade or so and many do, and you feel such a sense of pride it almost carries over to your inherent humanity. Just knowing that without you, the animal would starve and die. It brings with it profound touching tenderness and love for the creature that needs you in ways.
Many people that have departed would probably relay that the one lesson in life is to understand the divine, to understand what kind of a being it takes to take charge of other beings, because for the most highly evolved and adept meditation masters this will be your new job when you cross over.
To serve others.
We are all involved in such a serious pursuit, being existence, and to waste it away on the trivialities of life is such a waste. I think it was ordained long ago that there would be countless resources directed at alleviating boredom, but essentially the simplest lesson, being meditation proves to be the wisest pursuit to gain enlightenment.
However I can only meditate a few times a day or I would go nuts, a life should be more diverse than that! And truth is… we need mindless entertainment once and awhile, like REAL HOUSEWIVES lol :)
Anyways blogbuddies have a good day or week and catch ya on the flipside !!
-Shaun A. Delage




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Misbehaving Monkz






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CaT FooD BrioChe





To constantly nourish ones soul remains the highest priority, there is so much distraction that people with any skill in meditation can sometimes skip a week or two before they get the chance to meditate.
All I have is time, I am one of the lucky few that has been able to find a calling amidst a life of seeming failure, I have embraced being a funded Buddhist lay monk, I am able to pay all my bills while having copious amounts of time at my disposal, something people that are involved in this whole apparatus lack essentially is time.
I have been taking baby steps to better my intuition because I believe it is a calling for me to be somewhat psychic or intuitive and to be genuine about it. I think many people out here on earth are naturally intuitive but fail to see the characteristics simply because they can’t guess the winning lottery numbers, and it is true that you can be obscenely intuitive with seeming strangers over your own world because if we could simply guess our own lottery numbers nobody would be working as a psychic they would be sitting on a yacht in Monaco sipping Moet.
So I have been taking baby steps and it is tough to rely solely on intuition but when I lack the confidence I simply remind myself of my history and the fact that I have had an extremely bizarre life which affords me the gift of psychic powers, the ability to tell somebody their future and whether their next steps are the right path. So I have opened a mini presence online in the virtual world of SL and in a few places online. Just taking baby steps, what it took me to get to this level is many synchronicities that play out in real life like somebody mentioning something a week prior and it plays out exactly as mentioned or I will think of a song and an hour later I will hear it on CNN of all places lol just when stuff like that adds up it really makes you question whether you have these abilities or not, and I have had precognitive dreams and such and things will automatically pop into my head twenty minutes beforehand.
So syncs…. But I also use quite some many crystals and herbs to help with that development and most psychics find out in their early thirties.
I come from a life of challenge, almost losing it beyond my control, from a life of crime and intrigue to almost taking off on a yacht around the world, meeting a twin of mine in a penthouse that tried to give me HIV, Being taunted on movie sets by satanists related to some powerful actors/aliens to being ‘involved’ with a Canadian ambassador, stuffing thousands of dollars into my pockets and staying up for sometimes weeks on end without food. I have been to hell and back literally, I know what is at stake, and it is our souls, and redemption. So when I doubt my abilities I think of these things and my path and the path of the obscure and enchantment, I think of what great powers I must have picked up along the way, now to only use them.
The simple causality that I have lived through it all and now get to live a life of fortunate circumstances lead me to believe that I have a purpose and a reason why exactly I am here rather than that of a simply anomaly.
People must get mad when they read my writing, all the brazen stuff I did, and most of it illegal, but what helped me is finding an eastern meditation technique that reversed all ignorance.
I feel lucky, lucky to be alive after all of that and yes I think about things that have happened quite a bit, I also think about how many of the multi millionaires I have met have probably died or lost it all in some way and no doubt my presence in this world has affected quite some many people from all walks of life.
Essentially the path of the Buddhist monk, too unfit to be ordained, too crazy to be in a sangha, too many disabilities to become a regular Buddhist monk so I am forced to create my own method to living, a philosophical presence that challenges belief systems and people in authority with a poetic lick.
When I wake I sit on the porch surrounded by tree’s and deer and songbirds and think to myself, wow I have made it, I am finally in my piece of heaven, the meditation has worked, now I can move to the next steps –the next levels, and my meditation will constantly change and define itself.
I give you this discourse so that it may better your day.
-Shaun A. Delage  






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CranBerry Paw







Religion and sexuality are touchy subjects for most lol and it is funny how many people I come across online that profess a belief in the bible and jesus and exemplify their hatred of gay and lesbian people.
This is funny, because I want to say “Even the pope doesn’t have a problem with gays, why should you” haha another reason I found Buddhism, and believe in it. And another reason why yours truly started his own virtual ministry.
I wanted this ministry because of the power to tell you the truth, the power to shove it in their face that I have a virtual ministry and am gay myself.
Especially in conspiracy circles people tend to be really closed minded, which astounds me, because if you are seeking answers and enlightenment and secrets to be unravelled you have to have the right disposition. The ability to overcome prejudice and hatred.
See many people would think I hate the people on my manifesto, but I don’t. I simply believe that by naming and picturing them I can provide a record for all of time of the issues that an individual has gone through, and I have tried to seek help only to come across quackery.
It is funny because people in my situation would feel pretty defeated and many give in and take their lives, but I feel I have much much more to offer every single minute I am alive longer.
I have found a unique healing concept, a virtual ministry, a virtual world, my novels, TECHNO, meditation and of course living in the furest.
I have gone down my own path without going into wiccanism which is tempting, because of the acceptance but I don’t believe people should be invoking things like deities or gods or whatever without fully comprehending what they are doing. Also I don’t think people should essentially do rituals they have no understanding or grasp of. Issue is people are so hungry to bend reality they will do whatever they can first and foremost to do it.
I am here to say that it takes a VERY long time, but whatever you will to do, it will happen.
I get small psychic incursions kind of like a pre cognition and it is small things like a few days before something I will say some key words or explain a concept and then I will see those words, the scenario or concept materialize in the form of a movie or webpage in reality.
This leads me to believe that my manifestation is working, that I can bring whatever  I need to myself and it is funny because there are still people that believe if you look within you are a Satanist or whatever –no saving them I guess, they are under the direction of forces beyond me.
I have always wanted to be in control of my destiny and my own future and my fate. Not left up to some powerful magical entity that requires your constant adoration for your future success.
Truth is, 90% of the world has no fucking clue!
They believe in 2000 year old books, old men in the sky, and that all gay men want operations to become women lol
I have seen and battled the illusions from all end of the spectrum, including from within my own community, having relations with men and having them try and barter my soul or having drag queens sexually assault you. Having parents beat you or having friends try and kill you.
The illusion and the magic is so far reaching I don’t even know where to begin. I just know, I am a proud gay guy, a Buddhist, I love techno, I love the net, I love cats and chillen in the forest, I love virtual stuff and reading and am very fond of meditation.
So as long as I can embrace that core belief and not self destruct in anyway I personally have a tool to get me through endless weeks and months in this matrix.
Then I am at the other end of the spectrum and the nuclear plant and radiation leaking and I am in a sense in a rush to get my words to the eyes of the people that need them the most.
So in a sense I have all the time in the world, yet may not have another day lol
It is a very confusing time to be alive, and only the intellects question everything, one can figure out a lot in isolation.
But the essential key is to know your core self and nurture those qualities to absolute success. Because we’re all born differently. 

-Shaun A. Delage  





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I have never asked for a dime from a single person, nor have I received more than a few dollars in many years, as well, I have never weaved fantasy or fiction, my life story is the truth. Be careful of your money and your time invested in people there is a lot of suffering in the world, that is all I have wanted to alleviate. This continues to be a buddhist ministry rather than a christian ministry, a non denominational virtual church, I don't claim to be a guru of any sort, only a simple buddhist monk and reverend of the Church of Techno. 


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arc angel reading

We are overjoyed on the Heavenly plane for our connection with you this day. We have Heavenly
messages to share with you about your life at this time.
The Archangel Michael steps forward this morning to confirm that you have a natural psychic ability that can
be further developed and expanded if you so choose. In order to develop this beautiful gift, Michael asks you
to pay greater attention to your intuition. This can come in many forms such as an unusual or unexpected
thought, a gut feeling, or a subtle or silent whisper that seems to flow from your heart. You are asked to close
your eyes and be aware of all that you feel around you when time permits. The universe is alive, the earth and
nature are living energies. Michael indicates that whether you know it or not, there is an aspect of you that is
in constant communion with all of creation and therefore also in constant communication with everyone and
everything. It is confirmed that all you need to expand this wonderful ability is already within you. Simply
start to listen to your inner voice and trust your vibes and natural instincts. Archangel Michael will show you
the way and you will be discovering a whole new way of being.
This is also a time of wonderful healing, creativity and love. It is said that love conquers all and the Angels
say this is especially true for you at the moment. Something in your life is being resolved and healed through
love. What was previously barren now becomes fertile. A seed is planted and you are the co-creator. The
Angels want you to know that the conditions are favorable and the timing is right in which a new creation
awaits you. The birth of something new will bring joy and excitement to your life. The forever changing
seasons of eternity turn their invisible wheel and a new cycle now begins in your life and a new image is now
born.
The Angels and Spirit indicate that you radiate much love and wisdom, yet you stand firmly in your own truth
as well. From this standpoint, you are able to see beyond the veil of illusion. The Angels share with you this
message today to reflect these qualities within yourself. You are advised to stand your ground with regards to
a particular person or issue in your life at this time. The Angels ask you to stand within your own truth and do
not be swayed by another person's beliefs, opinions, or views. If something does not feel right to you, then it
is truly not. The Angels ask for you to trust your intuition and gut feeling this time. Be true to yourself. You
can respect another person's views without having to change your own value system. If it does not align with
your values, then the Angels ask you to not take it on.Spirit brings this last message directly from the Heavens indicating that positive news and a positive outcome
is near. The anxious await is nearly over and a time of celebration is coming. You will soon receive good
news, as this may come from a land far away or it may come from someone close to you. In any case, an issue
of major importance will have a positive outcome in the near future. This may relate to you personally or
someone dear to you. Either way, you will feel a great relief and you will now rest easy in the knowledge that
all was well. The Angels ask you to thank the Heavens for this blessing and give thanks to the earth and stars
as well. Remember that your life is forever held in their eternal embrace. Whether you know it or not, you are
always surrounded by unconditional love and they send you this confirmation now.
The angels indicate that you've been dreaming about something of importance to you and they ask you to keep
focused on your dream at this time. They confirm with me that you will soon achieve a goal that you have set
out for yourself. Your hard work and persistence is about to pay off. They ask you to realize that you deserve
all of the success that is coming your way and ask you to acknowledge this to yourself as you celebrate your
achievements. The Angels ask you to thank the universe including Creator and your Guardian Angels for this
blessing in the knowledge that all you do is a co-creation with the higher powers that be. They confirm that
you need to refocus your attention back to the task at hand and do not lose sight of your original purpose and
intention. This is only the beginning; much more can be accomplished provided you keep focused on your
dream at this time.
Your hard work and persistence is about to pay off. They ask you to realize that you deserve all of the success
that is coming your way and ask you to acknowledge this to yourself as you celebrate your achievements. The
Angels ask you to thank the universe including Creator and your Guardian Angels for this blessing in the
knowledge that all you do is a co-creation with the higher powers that be. They confirm that you need to
refocus your attention back to the task at hand and do not lose sight of your original purpose and intention.
This is only the beginning; much more can be accomplished provided you keep focused on your dream at this
time. You are asked to remember what is truly important to you. It may be helpful to set a new goal as well
and this could be bigger and more fulfilling than you have ever imagined!
Divine Blessings

and another =

I focused about your question. I feel you are on the
right way. I feel you are only at the beginning in fact.
I feel you will have spiritual journey in 2014.
It will be a physical trip too as a pilgrimage.
I feel it will be a key for your future well-being.
I feel you a have a special connection with the spirits.
“God is gracious” is your name!
This is not a coincidence (in former Hebrew).
I feel you have in you the spirit to be a leader, to help.
I feel your career must be in this way. I see people
listen to you as a teacher.
You will success. I feel a meeting, a spiritual meeting in
2014. Your sense of art will help you to create links.
Be confident.
I hope I helped you


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piece by peace







My life lately has been a sad evolution, after living with my mother for almost 4 years after a breakup of 9 years I have decided to leave home and move to a lake beside Victoria named Shawnigan lake hehe named after meh.
Evolution and change it seems are very hard to do, somebody told me after venting some frustrations of living with family –you can move, were all given the same chance in life.
Sadly because of finances and such I felt trapped. Most youth these days are living at home as well and the ones that are not are living in a painful plethora and confusing array of slavery, social obligations and servicing debt
While I view moving in with a trusted and amazing friend a beautiful miracle, that I am permitted to live a rural existence, I am pained by my last attempt to move to the lake, I wanted out but when I got here the isolation and everything got to me
While I also identify as being non sexual with a partner it is easier to say hey bud lets just be roomies hehe
I am rather defeated by love it seems, not being able to identify into a sexual role per se but a technological sexuality
My life it seems must go through stages of letting go for me to move onto enlightenment
My end goals are a Buddhist hermitage on Denman island at the moment and it is a glorious miracle as well that I am able to handle money even as a monk, the kagyu lineage is not particularily conservative and it is a monastery that I will be working to build from the ground up- they have a yurt for meditations an RV and some cabin style accommodations
It has been my focus to ordain as a Buddhist monk since taking two 10 day retreats in the Vipassana meditation centres and while those doors are shut to me there is the ability to possibly ordain in an ancient tibetian lineage rather than the conservative thai therevada lineage
I would have to save up money to go to Nepal to be ordained but would eventually come back as a full fledged Buddhist monk and this remains my focus and my goal
While Buddhism is a rather odd faith to believe in, it is also rather reclusive and  offers things like shaving hair, celibacy, no eating after noon etc which to the common laity seems a bit of an extreme measure but one many nuns, monks and llamas undertake
It has been painful the past couple days almost severing ties to my old life and welcoming and adapting to change, this was my greatest fear- 2012 seems to be a time of not undertaking grave adventures or making undue risks but maybe this is the propaganda at work who knows, just sit back and watch the world go by because it is going to end haha
What I find most appealing about monastic living is being around beings of my own kind, evolved, smart, happy, compassionate, sincere, sensitive old souls striving for enlightenment and it is a life long commitment
The lord Buddha instituted the monastic order to alleviate the suffering of the householding life.
While I also identify with being a lay hermit it seems that this hermitage would fit considering I would have a lifelong income afforded to me due to my illness but I understand it would be a lot for the monastery to take on, a medicated insomniac schizophrenic gay guy but monks and nuns are never perfect
Mostly nobody sees any shreds of mental illness in me, thanks to my medication I am on and it is prevalent in times of stress
It is very terrifying to make rash choices in life and deal with the outcome
But I believe I am being protected and guided by forces none of us can understand
My life was an internal prison structure and I need an evolved step to bring me to my most ultimate purpose. Life deals out choices like this
Most likely if I am refused in the denman island place I will look at moving back to Vancouver or choose to stay here in shaunigan lake hehe
Hold onto enlightenment, it acts swift
    Shaun A. Delage



cat paw massage







Well I am glad to see the church is continuing
I have never viewed my spending years upon years offering the discourses in enlightenment and ascension mixed with a little bit of craziness as a setback or a waste of time
exactly quite the opposite
I have had countless emails telling me to keep going, me so amazing hehe
just funny to be an online personality lolz
So I am at a fence in the road, I can continue my writing or simply let go and ordain as a Buddhist monk
The monk thing has been in my life for quite some time since taking Vipassana meditation courses – I adore monastic life, what I need to discover if this includes me, right now or shall I wait till I am 40 and have exhausted every avenue in the material matrix
Tough choice
But ordaining seems like the right choice for me, spiritually – To involve myself in the most reclusive and enlightened faith on the planet
A psychic recently said I can still do well in the material world, and if I should so choose, my books will gain quite the following but she also said about the monk thing…
This is an important decision for you. You can succeed in this material world. However, you would more easily fall into a life like a Buddhist monk. You would become happier with this type of life. You would do better here as your nature makes a spiritual existence more suited to you.

 The prospect of love and the idea of becoming a world famous author and artist keep me going in this reality but none of the material world gives me any sense of satisfaction
I have searched for love countless times, almost to lose my life- this is what people sing about
The paradoxes of love so how could I search this out, I even tend to wonder about my thinking process
The world has a lot of beauty and love in it, none of which I believe I have found, only materialism, hatred and illusion-nothing I want any part in, I strive to be around those of my own kind, uber intelligence, striving for enlightenment, ascension and evolution – some peace and quiet, assisting others through suffering is my greatest need considering the magnanimity of my own suffering
I believe I would make a great Buddhist monk hehe just I would miss things like, dinner, my hair and eyebrows, orgasms, shaving pubes, voting, clothes, luxurious beds lol (I know big one haha) television, techno, the internet among a few things
It would be tough to be around a bunch of other men in robes in the middle of the furest without thinking a sexual thought haha
Part of me wants to go the route that is the toughest but I can stick it out – to achieve enlightenment and be released from being reborn into constant suffering
I have always been anti religion which is ironic because I have held the titles of Reverend and Doctor for about 9 years – I don’t pretend to know it all or want to go into spirituality for egotist pursuits
I just think the eastern cultures has nailed down the paradoxes of enlightenment in a religion to the nine while the western religions lack any level of evolution
Only lost in a sea of riddles and wafers and baptisms god give my head a shake
So for me to ordain would be a big step, one in which I have been pondering my existence as such for about a decade and I imagine myself with robes on and no hair and no eyebrows god what a hot mess but I think I would make a sexy hairless monk
It would take a lot of courage to walk away from this blog, my novels, my virtual world of second life, the prospect of love and materialism in totality but a step in life I am willing to do, because I live with very little and it almost seems like a blessing to release holding money all together
To some people religion is poison
Just imagine trying to tell your mostly catholic family you want to be a Buddhist monk haha
Blessings

Just wanted to give my blogbuddies an update

-          Shaun A. Delage


quarry talk




The past month has been a whirlwind romance in the woods with a mountain man
I find the life of rural living to be intriguing but after living the life for a month I realized that it is not for me.
The isolation really got to me, not having my own comforts I am used too
I also strongly believe I am asexual at this point which affects 1% of the populace
I believe I have a lot to offer somebody other than a sexual life but in a sense I felt it was unfair to bring this to the table when he deserved somebody that is more able to satisfy his needs
I find sexuality to be stifling and complex and being proudly gay and then leaning on asexual has me mystified as to the realms of sexuality
I appreciate being able to come into his life and likewise him with me
I was able to put some rest to my binge marijuana smoking
While I am tempted to smoke it again
I realize that marijuana wont bring me the enlightenment I require
And when your smoking $80 in one night and get nowhere
What is the purpose
I have actually grown to enjoy my enlightened state
While in my mountain cabin in the woods I discovered what we take for granted in the cities
I discovered that there are calmer more gentler souls out there that are not focus so solely on materialism and chasing after the things that media instills on us
I don’t view me moving out of my home and into a cabin and then moving out and back home as a falure per se
I am also able to dimensionally travel more when I am off of marijuana
The kindness and hospitality shown to me has been immense and I thank this man from the bottom of my heart for helping me discover and put to rest my monastic desire
I have realized that perhaps being tucked away in the forest in the middle of nowhere will bring me no enlightenment
My purpose is out here
Anyways I am going to hop offline now but wanted to write my thoughts on my adventures for my blogbuddies
-          Shaun A. Delage


monastic wait



Even one day in ascension is difficult, which is why people choose ritual like employment and other things to keep themselves amused. I have been in serious contemplation over Buddhist monastic life. Not only because of my own inherent spiritual programming but the desire to do something with my life that is epic that has substance that has meaning.
Every chance I get and I do get close to going away to discover this part of me, people get suspicious and say things that make me wonder. What is monastic life but doing the work of the lord Buddha.
In a way I have wanted to become a monk since about 20 yrs old. It is a complex theory to want to be a Buddhist monk because doing the buddhas work is very appealing and very sound and very honourable
I find I don’t really have an attachment to sexuality. I mean of course I am gay. But I don’t enjoy regular gay sex like everyone else, maybe a by product of my sex work I have no idea.
I don’t really have a purpose or a role in society. I am not receiving any help whatsoever as far as ascension goes from the system and this leads me to believe I am being held in pseudo captivity
The only way I can really discover this, is if I go discover the meditation centre on my own.
It is pretty far, quite the setback financially to go visit which is why i was looking for assurances of my safety and security, something the centre is not willing to provide.
They have only told me that first time visitors to the centre are limited to 10 day stays
They want to meet me and get to know me.
I think I would be a prime candidate to enter a monastic order, I have the devotion, the happiness, the life experience, and the ability to give discourses. But also in this is my ability to live simply while people ten years younger are passing me by so to speak.
I guess in a way I have tried the householding life, I have experimented living on my own with a roommate the past 3 years and I seriously question whether I have a role out in this reality
I think my involvement in a spiritual faith would ground me, and fill me with its own enlightenment
Of course I am petrified of people and stuff like this, new things. To show up one day and say I am moving in seems a bit out of place but also in the right regard how can I be sure I want to live there without even showing up to meet the people and monks and teachers behind the order.
I am putting some deep thought into this and I don’t know where the answers will lead me
But I do know I am going through a societal dysphoria in a sense. I feel I have no directive in a slave based society. Philosophy is my main language. I cant seem to find a suitable mate with qualities I seek
Plus I have been mostly celibate for about 10 years off and on minus virtual secks But I mean with another partner I can count on one hand. This makes me a bit of an oddity and I even saw my psychiatrists face when I told him I practice celibacy and renunciation
When I listen to Buddhist discourses on birkens website I only grow more fond of monastic life ....Then I understand how I am treated by those men that I am supposed to be in love with and I am only left with more questions.
What leads me onto this path is complex. Terribly complex. It is a combination of poverty, my living situation with family, slavery, enlightenment, meditation, my dissatisfaction, my frustration with society
This constant barrage of information that is taking place puts one person on the level of a microprocessor and you are constantly being used as a digital tool
Then you throw in fear based psychological operations and other things like media and music and we have ourselves an illusion of identity
I guess in a way I have been in an observational state. Observing those people attached to reality and studying them. I see how inherently dissatisfied they are and how they use things like addiction, drama and anger to solve their inherent paradox of enslavement
Another issue all together is my income. I am on a priests wage but they don’t give me a penny more. It is barely enough to pay all my bills and live on and spending money is usually out of the question
I have always wanted to meet a guy that could help me with this or whatever but no men seem to want to include themselves in my life, and I have looked, maybe I am unapproachable
 I truly believe I want to be around people that are like me, think like me, have depth, character, they have goals of ascending and becoming enlightened and helping others
There is the fear that sets in like oh man I will be living in a hut in the forest with no hair or eyebrows in robes kind of a pathetic existence lol but it is much more than that.
It is putting yourself into a role that matters, where you have substance, where you are in effect a spiritual leader. You have worked to attain your own personal enlightenment
I have never given in to too much ceremony or ritual in Buddhism and have never really attached to group meditations or whatever
People around me say I should start out small with baby steps and perhaps just go to meditate with a group or something
But it is deeper than that, it is about being immersed in the culture, being safe, having the rules in place for protection ...nothing I will find by attending a weekly meditation it just couldn’t offer me the same serenity
My income too is for life, So I am at a very opportune time to discover this. Even if I choose not to handle one more dollar oh well but if i discover I dont enjoy them then I  have the ability to hop on a plane if need be and come back to reality.
I am a strange raver as you can tell lol 
I don’t know if I will come to any conclusive results in my meditations this week
I guess we will all see
I like how this is developing though *smiles*
Take care of yourself
-          Shaun A. Delage