ticky deer

The truth about or economic system and the worlds system lays with one considerable fact, The USA has been bankrupt since 1933 after which time emergency declarations were made and we have been in a perpetual state of war, they also used the collateral of our birth certificates and our beings as collateral for this debt. In just twenty years the federal reserve system went bankrupt hence the banks willingness to loan out tons of money it didn’t have and make us pay ten time more on it

The greatest illusion plaguing many millions of people this very moment is that the banks charge on average of 140% interest on a home mortgage but lead you to believe that you are only paying 7% or even 21%

So many people are ensnared into a virtual web and it is Satanist in nature because there may be no saving us. I don’t doubt there is a massive kill switch in place to virtually shut everything down and return us to our ancient roots. It is bound to happen at some point

We have almost exhausted our futurist conceptualization to tiring ends with no results because the secret societies have not allowed us to progress and keep us in a perpetual state of 1990

People envisioned flying cars and metallic suits by now and it is funny because you have others that believe this reality is all contrived as simply electrical impulses and a massive multiplayer online virtual world of sorts

Most of our lives can be construed as fiction but it is funny because we live in a fictional reality of sorts – the people with more wealth and power are actually the ones most indebted to the system and are trying at all ends to have the system stay in place

Even though divinity and universality are beginning to take hold in this massive concentration camp we all live in. Much of it has to do with a few puppeteers like the bush obama crime syndicate and others like the queen of England whom has been the master puppeteer for seemingly longer than anybody can remember

Whether we get returned to our more natural ancient roots and are forced to live off the land without any support whatsoever from the system or we all go out in one insane nuclear blast is beyond me but I believe people are positioned in this coming shift in reality for maximum exposure

I strongly believe it is karmic forces that have placed me in a resort community where I may be forced to live out world war 3 but I am happy here more happy than anywhere else I have been and I just wonder whether people locked into systems and matrix’s called cities are even somewhat karmically fortunate?

For a city boy to suddenly land in the forest and surrounded by hummingbirds and deer and frogs is a big adjustment to do in 2012 and it was my fear that lead me right back into the hands of my controllers the first time, but divine energy had its way and let me move back a 2^nd time and this time it is for good.

I strongly believe many of us will survive, but not people hopelessly locked into the systems avenues like materialism and vanity to name a few but also many people seem to be poverty minded or slavery minded so they will never begin to let go and lock into the natural harmonies of earth and animals to survive.

There are stories such as interstellar webs and such that keep us all confined here and space weapons that will forcibly shoot down any alien willing to come close to attempt to rescue us but I believe there is some illusion in believing we are all in space somewhere out of 12 planets etc

I believe moreso that it is a box of sorts that we are all housed in with planets and such so the truth is close but they have lied to us because there is thousands of these boxes stacked in place with the exact same self similar repeating circumstances happening across the board

I strongly believe in parallel realities and I believe I am interlocked with myself or a being like me on an other dimension, be it a lower realm or an astral realm I cannot begin to describe but when I go to sleep it is not the humdrum of hypotheticals that lul me to sleep

It is a complex story seen through my brain of me, somewhere else, a complex hypothagrim of events and scenes and stories interwoven in an amazing parallel reality site – this was afforded to me by my rave days and completely bringing myself into full comprehension and awareness of the enlightenment that the rave days of the early 90’s brought many people

This is why they don’t want us doing drugs or experimenting with things like dimensions or mediations or really altering the consciousness in any way and the resulting punishment is banishment in further prison states (secret worlds) within our reality where they throw anybody willing to question the system or expand their consciousness along with murderers rapists etc

I cant stress enough to get prepared for the coming catastrophes be in as little way as possible and begin to address your own internal illusions. Take some time to meditate by candlelight, sit quietly and welcome the information that is streamed to you via other galaxies or realities depending on your point of view but also take time to send out things like sickness, hatred, pain, abuse, trauma, sadness, anger, hostility and negativity and give it back to the earth that gave it to you

-          Shaun A. Delage

Pear Dumpling

It is an extremely terrifying time to be alive, I am thankful that I have just over a quarter decade behind me and how terrifying it must be to be a twink or twinkette just maturing in a complete police state and global financial meltdown

Luckily I have my intelligence and life experience somethings that many people don’t have or take for granted, we’re taught in western society how much you own is the makeup of your character and this is unfortunate because it provides people with a false sense of belonging

I have to say for a blog of this magnitude I am very fortunate to have some devotees and that is what you are but you are also enlightened in your own regard, and my enlightenment at times can be purely text based, I have mastered typing and storytelling and giving discourses but sometimes struggle with normal forms of communication

My art site so far has no sales, which leads me to believe first of all that my art is very bad or ahead of its time lol but for the most part I understand it is a chaotic time to be selling anything which is why I am going head on with marketing in various formats.

I have designed my own postcards in which I send to galleries and I am sure they are feeling the struggle too financially but there is always time for more art in the world, not a time to cower with my art between my legs however hehe

So I have taken out advertising in XTRA west which you can see the classified below this posting and my next course of action will be to formerly issue thousands of press releases and also continue with the classifieds (I am in xtra west and also the Calgary and Edmonton gay newspaper)

We are bombarded by advertising but I just struggle with the thoughts of how Warhol or Emily Carr did it…so my next courses of actions include the postcards, classifieds, press releases and some facebook advertising

Imagine this, I also have goals to attain my Ph.D in this time as well !!!

Kinda a crazy time to be doing these things but I have the time, thankfully and a small stipend by the government that affords me the ability to live in peace with zero stress.

I have almost put my manifesto behind me, I don’t think of it much but it is one of those things that once people read it – it changes their impressions, of me, and the world around them and shines light on the fact that anybody any old joe or susan could be being traumatized or abused this very moment by an unkind and sadistic system that is encapsulated around them

It is really tough to look at the world from the eyes of a medicated schizophrenic agoraphobic and enigmatic mind. Thankfully once my time is up here I will be hailed as a genius

Genius is often misunderstood in the moment, mocked, ridiculed, killed off almost too quick

Now I have a sanctuary in the forest and have somebody close to me, a loving partner that I can live with on my terms and this is what I have been looking for since my last breakup 4 years ago

I endlessly posted ads, mostly just to be mocked in the process but I found many people were willing to lead you on and make you believe they were the right person, after some coy sleuthing in text and emails, I usually found the person to be completely unsuitable for me after only a few emails

It is tough to date when you have a social anxiety or the stigma of a mental illness, which is why I strived to find somebody that would appreciate me for who I am and most people have this insane twitch to abuse others constantly and this is what I so casually picked up on

I have walked away from asexuality, because I believe I have some skill to offer my partner in the sexual department but it isn’t easy – I have been pretty asexual or celibate for about 12 years then a teenage hood of sexwork before that – that was not very pleasing nor satisfying just the dozens of gross old koots willing to throw hundreds of dollars on your naked body in hotel rooms astounded me, the world was ripe for the picking when I had a few minor violent encounters with some hair pulling and slapping while I was supposed to be having fun, then a Masonic inspired rape by subliminals and pawns people were ready to call me insane, maybe I was insane but my illness- to see things out of reality was the only illness I would most likely embrace. imagine coming from making $400 an hour to just under that to spend PER MONTH !!!! but I am not complaining - I am at peace with myself and the learning process and there is some deadly infections out der >:/

My diagnosis helped me tremendously, and before the financial collapse I was placed on a disability pension so my stipend is there for me to pursue my goals and dreams in small doses.

I didn’t do so well as far as being employable and found illusions in everything and everybody

I found people in employment scenarios to be cold, calculating and utter Nazis

Now I get to be a crazy artist and I love it, I have many many years before my novels will hit the mainstream and it will be time, almost when ravers seem like a flicker of the past I will revive the culture with a beautiful and amazing novel that will make anybody want to listen to a techno stream, put on some candy and buy a bottle of banana puree baby food and matching soother from the drug store and just effin dance

I am thankful that my own satanic oriented karma and actions didn’t manifest in the form of murder or violence, because that is so far from my soul it is not even funny.

Me, it manifested as an ex sex worker going nude at embassies, nunneries and universities

Kind of funny to laugh about it all now but it was terrifying at the time because I thought that if I didn’t go nude they would eat my leg

Or if I stripped at the Buddhist temple they would put robes on me and declare me a monk.

I have put my fascination with monasticism to rest because I have found their doors to be closed to me here completely –for such an open and accepting religion the Buddhist faith seems to be riddled with secrets and a secret society – nobody knows what the hell you have to do to ordain but they are not willing to ordain any new members it seems

In a sense it would have been hell to ordain, no sex, no food-after noon, no media, no books, no talking, no techno, no warmth, no hair, no anything. Kind of weird to want to attain this but it seemed appropriate considering the Buddha wanted to offer these places for people dissatisfied with the material world

Now my manifestations have brought me and cute man and a forest loft in the country, a cat that loves me –adores me actually and I have a circle of about 50 friends mostly online that also care about me

Sure beats the illusions I have been seeing in other, younger, more naïve souls.

I am pondering some higher education as well, I think this would be a good step for me, I would take out a student loan and study and then because of my disability it would be forgiven

So why not? :P

It has been a blessing to move away from a monarch sciences type scenario living with somebody constantly nattering your face off even though you seem unamused, I think I have a mean mother at times, she can be pretty cruel to me, for the most part were best buds but I found living with a middle aged woman to be a challenge not only as a gay man but somebody with various hinderances

I found her the opposite of anything I desire to be, cold, uncompassionate, materialistic, vain, neurotic, angry at times, trapped in illusion etc I just sat there endless late nights avoiding her and doing my own art projects and doing my novels, so my novels are a reflection of my isolation in wanting to create my own virtual world and play in it, and that I did. They were also a place for me to funnel my anger and sadness into.

Novel writing is a cold dark barren world, not one in which I advocate anybody to belong too but I started my projects so I am going to carry them through to the end.

Meanwhile, we have a very chaotic and crazy world we belong too and it has only intensified with the times changing into the full on 2012 police state. We have a varying distinction of those who have all the power and wealth and for the most of us those that have very little power or wealth

What it all comes down to, is who is left standing in the end. People that have millions behind their last name but only do things that they have subscribed to attain in life and not look into mystery paradox or their own god given creativity will go nowhere but forwarding the illusion state for the sheeple

There is very few people willing to put their life in the open like I have, to be studied, to be ridiculed, to be mocked, to be gabbed about but I wonder who is going to be left standing with all the power in the end

Much of the people on my manifesto are pretty wealthy and they get wealthier each day that goes by

The funny thing is that anybody on that document is free to sue me but to date no charges have been filed against me and no civil suit either in such a litigious society you would think that I would have threats or being served by now, but the funny thing is, there isn’t a damn thing anybody on my manifesto can do about it because it is based in the truth.

My only goals: the truth, power, beauty, intelligence, love, happiness, to be healthy, to be safe, enlightenment, wealth, money, authority.

-          Shaun A. Delage

XTRA WEST

This is my ad in xtra west gay newspaper with 40k readers (toronto edition) 

I am in the next 5 weeks !!!

Canada national Debt 585 Billion !!!

http://www.debtclock.ca/

Red Ant

I have been thinking and pondering quite a bit lately on the bodyparts killer and I cant really help it the media is everywhere on the subject and you cant really escape the madness when it is in your face

I have been pondering what exactly would trigger somebody to murder another being but our culture promotes this behavior with the amount of EXTREMELY DISGUSTING movies and games out there

With full mutilations, murders and other disgusting apparently fictional scenes play out

I strongly believe that much of what we see can be construed as real and I believe strongly that some of the gore we see has some depths of reality in it however it may be displayed in film

When one is triggered by these scenes their mind wanders and they get obsessed with such phenom

Which is why I advocate to get rid of as much of this influence as possible in ones life

An enlightened being would not watch such horrors why should you ?

I also think quite a bit of it has to do with the distaste for society and its inklings and everything about living in a capitalist society would make one want to give up and murder and get a life sentence

In this country you can get 15 years in jail for robbing a store and 10 months for murder

It also has some depth to do with the monarch sciences and promoting trauma and having people bred for the purpose of committing such atrocities in real life

When people are so hatefully abused and forgotten by a system that only cares about its own material progression there is no saving them because they are literally a trauma abuse asset and everything they can and do can be attributed to trauma

Enlightened beings only surround themselves with beauty and love and happiness

When you begin to mix in forays of neglect hatred and sadness there is no saving the route you go under

But as well humanity as it is is quite disgusting of an existence so hard to stop the mind from thinking how almost disgusting it is to be a human being with sickness and bodily functions

The pressures of society also take hold to be purely materialist and forward oneself in that regard seems to be our only goal and this is not the goal of more spiritual ancient cultures

I also beg to differ that murder etc are man made sins and the ancient cultures of native culture and tribal culture actually promote things like murder decapitation and cannibalism

It is only the status elites that have grown used to making us pay for our crimes

I strongly feel though that anybody with enlightened qualities would never attain to hurt another living being, would never take part in that sort of horror and would never want to broadcast things like pain, hatred or sadness on another

Me much of my sadness comes from a life of crime and a life of sex work and I was not left with many other options in my life within this cold dark matrix we are living in

I relate to sex workers claims that people can be violent etc and am thankful that that is not my life anymore and am set free from that existence with a life of happiness and love now and have learnt my lessons and have attained to never hurt another being or inflict pain on another so hard for me to delve into the mind of a killer but I cant help but relate in some ways

What a painful existence with many pressures we live under

I was saddened to see my other conspiracy site illuminatimatrix has not been updated in quite some months and I am happy to say the church of techno will continue to offer enlightened discourse well into the future so be loyal and be happy because it is the work of the divine that I may type this for your enjoyment

PLUR

-          Shaun A. Delage

3 citizen news stories I posted

Ebay complicit in gay discrimination


JESSICA ALBA IMPLICATED IN HIV SCANDAL


Dan Goodleaf implicated in prostitution scandal

Pickle Calico

What a creative time to be alive, and the reality is manifesting itself as quite a peculiarity lately

Mostly in the news we have things like bodyparts killers, cannibals, austerity and Greece collapsing

For the most part there seems to be a sexuality war on with straights pitted against gays, the religious against the non etc.  I truly believe that we are given many freedoms here and an almost trickery of the gods that run this realm is that if one individual is given many freedoms their mind goes nutz and soon enough you have things like molestation, and murder running rampant

Which is why I theorize that this is a pseudo repository or purgatory of sorts where you are judged and sent off to the lower hell realms or the very very few that are lucky and have divine natured souls, compassion, happiness, etc and have done their lives work get to ascend into the more divine realms

I always question how a god or divinity could allow such atrocities to take place which is why I think that this matrix we are all housed in is this pseudo judging station where everything you do is watched be it by interdimensional orbs or aliens or angels, and you are critiqued based on your actions whether you are fit to ascend or like most who have sold out and contributed trauma and abuse on loved ones and strangers you get to descend to lower more vulgar realms where you belong

Not saying that everyone is going because some youth and teens and kids etc do some pretty stupid things but there comes a time when you are pretty much meant to learn your lessons and move on and if you don’t and continue trauma then of course your soul will not gain entrance into more divine realms where like minded souls exist to perpetuate enlightenment in their existence

It must be brutal to be the one that says descend/ascend but without that authority there would be dimensional chaos and the whole reality or realities would be cast into the hell realms forever more

And most people dream of heaven and a better place where you have a castle and endless money and jewels and love and futurist trains to visit your loved ones

I have no doubt the future is watching us in the present to be able to choose who gets to join them in their enlightened realms but as well the more shady realms and vulgar realms also requisite the nasties into their realms as well which is why we have the spectrum of the black and white squares on the checkerboard floor

Me, I have made mistakes but also around 2005 worked to attain absolution of my sins for perpetuity so that I may feel more content with my existence and this is the glorious work of the divine

Much of life is learning from your mistakes and many of those surrounding me don’t get me, I am pretty simple minded and simple things please me, definitely not materialism

Mind you if I had one hundred million in my savings account I think I would go pretty nuts but most people have to do disgusting things to get that amount of blood money

I strongly feel that I am doing my life’s work by marketing my art movement, however bizarre male art with collage impressions may seem in the moment and writing my novels etc and I know god or divinity laughs at my silly attempts at stardom but at some point the negativity is going to have to lift and I am able to ascend into full liberation

In meditation I always strongly focus on the following words to aid my growth

I ask for power, authority, happiness, wealth, liberation, enlightenment, intelligence, art and love for all beings

I tend to repeat that as a mantra while welcoming those words energy then stop to cycle the earth a few times then move onto metta meditation which is sending your energy out and I do two things,

I send energy to all my relations, no matter whom then close my aura and protect it

Then I also send out things like, negativity, hatred, sickness, anger, suffering, trauma and abuse back to the earth that gave it to me in a grounding cord of sorts to the middle of the earth so that it may utilize that energy for good and to reverse some of the negativity in my being, since I am imprisoned here by gravity and forces I cannot control I feel in essence it is a smart thing to do – to return that negativity to the source that gave it to me and say, no thanks

I am just thankful that my own psychosis manifested itself in the form of nudist Buddhism and not complete grizzly murderous rage and this is a rare thing to be diagnosed with schizophrenia it only affects about 1% of the population of earth but it also carries a scary stigma associated with it. I was horrified when I found out that the greyhound bus head eating murderer was diagnosed with schizophrenia – I was like fuck I would never do that that is disgusting but there are many forms of schizophrenia and there is no cure

I strongly believe that each individual forwards their own enlightenment if they should so choose, if they watch horrors, play disgusting video games and just work as a slave there is no saving them

Thankfully I am stable and sound and have learnt from my mistakes, received proper therapy and catscans and time to reflect in a hospital several times, to me taking my clothes off at an embassy or a Buddhist nunnery seemed normal at the time but it took several hospitalizations and very awesome Canadian care to help me to understand that I have a life long condition and that awareness is sublime

Not to mention I get a lifelong pension for it haha but that is a whole other story all together – but it isn’t easy living on what I live on, it may be a free income but I am left with very little choices or entertainments which is why I take on projects like art or novels or meditation because creativity and expression are free

I am doing things I enjoy and living life on my terms, not having to submit myself for endless indoctrination or exams or whatever and am living in an enlightened state now with no stress and a kind and loving gentle man that loves me as much as I adore him

Peace and beauty seems to be my driving force

-          Shaun A. Delage

NecRONiM (4th ShoWiNG) and FREE @!

FREE MARC EMERY

FREE COLTON HARRIS-MOORE

FREE MICHAEL ALIG

FREE BRADLEY MANNING

FREE JULIAN ASSANGE

The american empire is over and its going to be Horrifying

thumbitisk

It is a chaotic time to be alive. In my country quebec is rife with student protests and anarchy haha kinda amusing and some students go to the level of kicking police in the face.

This is only going to intensify as more measures are introduced that are unpopular

As well we in Canada are going through a difficult time, the most unpopular government is leading the show and they seem as if they are untouchable, but I would not want to have to travel with a  riot squad just to eat lunch like most of our politicians

The conservative government claims a majority etc and claims they have a divine right to rule

The only government that has gone through two prorogations of parliament and the only government in the commonwealth in history that was found in contempt of parliament

They are happily selling off most of the country to other powers and making the way for the North American Union. I am somewhat of a passive anarchist – choosing to bring my fight to the net

I enjoy the freedoms of my country but I don’t like the way in which our country is heading.

Basically the catholic church has free roam in Canada to do what they please and this is bothersome

I believe there are some divine beings within the catholic church and it does some righteousness but that is very rare. Every individual that has been indoctrinated by their faith believe that if they donate fifty dollars after the sermon when they pass the pots around believes they will go to heaven hence the giving of tithe

I am almost embarrassed to have the title of reverend after reading some of the comments by ordained ministers in the USA regarding gay marriage and unions, and this is troubling that a reverend would preach to lock up gays in electric fences and let them die.

Thankfully I live in one of the most enlightened countries on the planet but we have an unenlightened dictatorship that literally stole the election thanks to their bilderburg contacts

Unless we go back to the most original form of voting there is no saving us, and people genuinely believe that the electronic voting systems are rigged for a favorable outcome according to the illuminati’s goals

This next few months are pivotal in humanity we may witness the younger generations steal back the power that rightfully belongs to them and execute all those responsible for their trauma

Not saying its going to happen but the elites are scared because they hide behind forces with guns and biological warfare-pepper spray and the like but in case of major discord we will see the police state in full function with sound weapons and heat weapons etc

No money is really going anywhere but into the funneled matrix’s

Its funny because most people will gladly give over their money to corporations like walmart, (futureshop/bestbuy-owned by the same people) mcdonalds etc because their inherent humanity is void of any relative humanity – they have become alien beings

I don’t know the whole process but I have witnessed this in people around me, and it could be as simple as something they put in their hair-I was shocked to find that my mother dies her hair continuously with powerful neurotoxins and brain damaging chemicals on a twice monthly basis just to hide her roots

Then instead of helping me with my books or my goals like a true parent she just dines on fancy meals at sell out restaurants and propping up her ego structure with like minded unintelligent beings that will forward her own demise

This is most of the planet

And we have lost many more in the last round of panic being the swine flu vaccine and these people are not even human beings anymore, there is no doubt in my mind there are many that are rife and infected with various alien nanotechnologies

So, essentially the people you deal with may not even be human, technically
then I bring in my dimensional argument that we are on one of thousands of earths all operating in the exact self similar repeating circumstance and the past as we know it is not applicable because of how many earths it has played out on.

The only thing you can do is look within at a time like this, don’t have to kick cops in the face but if they are deserving of it then by all means lol

The church of techno preaches love and acceptance however and adheres to PEACE LOVE UNITY AND RESPECT for all beings

It is not the cop with pepper spray that needs your attention, it is the grand wizard that has the power to choose your incarnation for you and that of the people around you animals and the like that should be shown to everyone and until we find that entity we will have virtually endless power struggles and chaos

Lately I have just found that anonymous wants to attack the status quo for the theory that marijuana prohibition is an illegal and dangerous act and I have to lend my support in this

I believe anonymous has the power to shut everything down like a kill switch because they are the original builders of the internet and have studied the various security measures in place

Most of the worlds trillions were actually wiped out when the twin towers fell and they needed to cover it up with the banking fiasco

I would throw my allegiance behind anonymous at this point proving their worth in social activism far supercedes anything that has been done in the past 112 years

Anonymous as a movement has potential and has the power to overcome all of societies dull expectations of its citizens

The only people with money these days are the ones that are behind pharmaceuticals, oil, tobacco, alcohol, the internet etc

As we speak people are being stripped of their incomes in countless forms, and it seems to have any worth in society you have to be able to hold alien qualities such as ritual and adhere to the solar sun cult among a few things but as well you must hold some level of sadism

Which is why people drown their sorrows at clubs etc is because they are just at the bottom of the pyramid scheme with no hope of ever reaching the top because the rituals are super secret

The only ones at the top are the ones that have gone so far down the path of ritual and sacrifice and given themselves over to sex cults, hazing, incest abuse and trauma etc

The only ones pulling the strings in any country (cuntry) are the ones that have been hazed, mutilated, engineered, chipped, and have undergone the highest rituals to relinquish their souls

While the rest of us try and get there with no hopes at all of ever reaching the far point and soon enough you're fifty and just want your pension and want to retire in peace.

I strongly believe that there is a controlled deathcamp of sorts going on all around us and the Satanist mind knows every soul on the streets starving and in poverty because this is the luciferian domain

If this was a heavenly realm we would be in a utopia of sorts and places like this do exist in the universe we have all just been confined here against our will and ensnared in things like soul entrapment and soul swapping etc

Those that give in and sell out remain here for eternity and constantly get new shells but there are far worse places to digress too but as well there are far more illustrious and beautiful places that you and I can ascend too There is traces of divinity all around, but there is also traces of evil

The greatest illusion is those that make you believe this reality is some form of heaven...it has the potential, yes, but far from it.

The only path you should concern yourself with is the most beautiful, the most divine and the most high.

-          Shaun A. Delage 

strawberry picnic

Many of us have pasts that we are hopelessly trying to recover from, be it abusive backgrounds and then the state or government failing to protect us in such matters or with me personally it is an abusive upbringing in a monarch family then them attempting to create imprints in my psyche that would render me a person that would continue abuse on others

With me personally the strongest has to be a false sexual abuse allegation made when I was like 11 or 12 against my own sister, and this lead to my own attempt on my life I believe, nobody could recover being beaten with a wooden spoon for lies, I cant say how it all happened throw in the brainwashing by an abusive father to his toddler daughter and we have ourselves an imprint.

I am not here to make sense of life, well perhaps I am but given my experiences in my manifesto I am lead to believe I am simply a trauma abuse asset that was lead around by Satanist forces to further market my own self and establish myself in the trauma abuse realm to further abuse others I have no idea, but I changed myself for the good and for the better of society by obtaining compassion, love and happiness

Nobody I don’t think could recover from that or about 1000 crimes of theft that I initiated on the matrix and the guilt that goes along with that is brutal or the fact that I was in sex work from as young as 14

Just a horrible existence not to mention being shuttled from new home to new home dozens of times.

Growing up in a chav family is difficult and stressing because we are not given multitudes of wealth like other families, but I have learnt to adapt and move on

Who could recover from trauma of this sort nobody, most end up dying, and we have lost many in the struggle because of this invisible force leading people unbeknown like a puppet or by people that should have some level of guidance in our lives end up using that power for evil

So here I am, a broken soul, but I am constantly working towards good and the more divine side, without giving into things like religion which is generally Satanist in nature.

It seems to me when you begin to deprogram yourself and work to enhance your being beyond the status quo you embark on a painful quest for righteousness and faith.

My faith rests in divinity – a faculty of divine entities guiding the structure around us as we know it.

I only have to look at my own creativity to find that nature

And I am in a good place. I get to watch hummingbirds drink sugar water and see deer eating long stemmed greens, I get to enjoy the company of a partner who loves me unconditionally

And this is what I have always been searching for, but never found.

I get to enjoy life finally without feeling defeated and I get to escape from inner turmoil and hopefully recover but many of us are so broken and so sad there is no rescuing some but if one finds their inner peace their inner beauty and their inner soul anything can happen

I am in the process of marketing my art site to galleries, clubs and salons, gay community centres etc

I like the idea of being self employed and I am almost done my final edit to my first book then onto the second one.

I am going places but the only person that can find that path is me, the matrix cannot tell you who you are

I have many things holding me back like the past I speak of, and various disabilities not to mention being nocturnal kinda seperates you from everything but I go on, I am worthy of a fortunate future, and I am worthy of redemption and love

I feel proud at all I have accomplished these past few years and haha I am glad that I am simply ‘alive’ given my travels. Most in my situation are dumped nude with slash marks across their body in a shopping cart.

But the blessed forces see me as something worthy of life, worthy of a beautiful existence and a charming male interpretation of a fairy tale

Life can be very beautiful if you let it but understand that spiritual leaders are broken as well

Only trying their best to overcome this realities harsh circumstances

It is a very difficult time to be alive and awakening

Keep your heads up tigers

The future is beautiful.

There is no other words that can describe it.

Shaun A. Delage