Virtual Ministry Archive

Showing posts with label path of buddhist monk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label path of buddhist monk. Show all posts

Finch Scotch





I have never doubted for a moment that one day I will be rich, when you manifest wealth it is not a matter of ‘if’ per se but more of a matter of ‘when’
But when you ponder wealth endlessly you begin to see the illusions of it all, and people think that once you get millions of dollars all your problems vanish –quite the opposite but you are given more resources to help solve some of those problems
Me, I have several things I want to happen when I get money, including a worldwide patent of an idea I have and other things like furthering my ebook to audio and marketing it more as a movie, then I also want a sort of no kill animal refuge where old cats or cats that would have been suited for the shelter could live as long as they want, and I also want the church of techno to materialize in the form of weekend long raves or week long retreats
And this is why the world doesn’t want more money out there in the supply then needed, it is happy at its continuance of things, the structure and reality –imagine if millions of people became millionaires overnight the kind of enlightenment the reality would see, we would have months long festivals, whole cruise ships booked, and tons of homeless set free, the possibilities would be endless
But anything can happen and that means winning the lottery, marketing a product, selling a book, making it rich. Don’t let anybody tell you ‘no’ don’t let anybody tell you ‘it can’t be done’ don’t let anybody tell you ‘it’s impossible’ because this reality is singular as opposed to a collective if you think about it, and the illusion will have you believe that there are many cattle out there or many fish in the sea –take a number- but it is exactly quite the opposite.
I think many people suffer from the Truman philosophy, more than we can quantify and there may be some truth in this, for those that don’t know the Truman show is a movie about a guy that finds out he has been in a reality show his whole life and didn’t know it, played by Jim Carey.
The truth is many of us may in fact be reality stars, many may be feeling like their every move is watched and let me throw two spikes into this hypothesis, one that other vast more advanced races or dimensions may in fact be watching and recording our every move as entertainment, they can simply switch from one person to the next being followed around by an invisible orb, with some being more popular than others. And two, it is a well-known fact that our lives are recorded in every instant for retrieval at a later date when we die and we can rewind our lives and understand the experiences.
Call my hypothesis paranoia, but I strongly believe our world is capable of it on a vast scale, and I only need to rewind a few events from my manifesto to understand that there is some vast level of illusion or conspiracy at play. There is also the factor of countless beings on the other side in the astral realities that would visit our realm even for a short time to check on us or observe, and then throw in the guardian angel aspect, and you realize you are not alone. This hypothesis would be proven false with the aspect that there is extreme suffering or extreme physical ailment at play but I think this is where the psychology of our masters comes to light, they would rather watch and observe and assist how they can but never reveal the illusion.
For those perceptive enough you can pick up on the old analog receiver signals that come on and off once and awhile in your brain, or commands, or you feel like every sort of minor daily event is somewhat scripted or clinical.
You can brush it off as mental illness or the rantings of somebody that did too much drugs but when you go down a path of solitude, and your surrounded by an unseen energy
You know
Anyways makes quite the blogposting for today as I feel either what I say is correct or our media is written by very cunning psychologists.
Hope you’re all enjoying the poetry

-Shaun A. Delage





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BrEAd CrUsT









Seeing a pet go through the process of death again has given me a new sense of responsibility and quite a bit more compassion for suffering, from the smallest of insect to the largest animal we are all struggling to survive any way we can.
I am at peace with my beloved daughter cats passing but I just hold dear to me that I have given my animals a good home, waited on their needs head and foot and totally gave my service to them so they may feel better and be at ease with their life.
All I need to take me through this is the fact that I gave them all the love I could and served them endlessly and with loss, you discover compassion. It was extremely tough a week prior learning we had to put her down, essentially starting the grieving process early.
I have no doubts she is the techno party in the sky, able to escape physicality.
Being a physical being isn’t easy, we always have the threat of death or sickness, and most people do things to make themselves sick but we do it anyway because it comforts us, like smoking or drugs or food for example.
All I wanted years ago was to become a Buddhist monk, and here I am, ordained as such living in my forest kuti and studying the esoteric and the dhamma and studying the philosophy behind the thai forest tradition.
I wrote my mom a letter the other day and told her everything that pisses me off about her lol I think people process things differently like death and grieving and anyways I wrote it and wanted to set the record straight on a few subjects and was a bit mean in the process while leaving the word bitch out.
Instead of giving her the letter I am going to have a closure ceremony, and bury it. The important part of my whole writing the letter was the truth coming out, but to me personally the most important part is that I KNOW the truth, I cannot advocate for her soul or anybody else’s. What I am here to do is to work on my own issues and escape the endless cycle of rebirth and countless past lives mistakes. So I wrote her a 4 page letter setting everything right but I feared that it may break her in a sense so I have the respect for her to let it all go and understand that it is in the past and to go through the process I need, to bring closure. **update, I have decided to send the letter and am letting it sit for a few days, really we don't have much of a relationship anyway except with gifts on holidays so I have nothing to lose at this point, it has some negativity but it is written with love and sent with the truth in mind, if she can't accept the truth than that is not my problem**Essentially this is what I have been doing of late because I took my manifesto down and I am beginning to let go. It is a tough process and some people can’t let go, forget or release the past hence why we have so many people addicted to things, or doing crime (or in jail) or sad and depressed.
They simply were not taught nor look for ways to release their anger and negativity.
Believe me when I am done here, I don’t want to go through the process of birth and youth again and sickness and death. I would love to ascend to much higher realms of beauty, intelligence and love
And perhaps reincarnate in a few hundred centuries when we’ve actually made it lol
I have a new respect for the simple mom, that doesn’t see herself as much but a sandwich maker and house cleaner and maid, because essentially people that keep the house going, make nutritious meals, and provide emotional support not to mention the only one that will actually clean the toilet......I see them in a new light because they offer a stable outlook, love and sensibility.
I believe my beloved cat is up there helping us out down here by putting in a good word to the powers that be, and that she is happy and well fed, she will always be in our hearts and she will always be in our lives, we have loved her unconditionally- If only a few people suffering could feel that for just one hour.
Keep your heads up, it’s a tough world out there but thankfully the powers that be gave us techno and meditation and wine and 420 and nice happy pills that make us smile hehe
Take care blogbuddies
-Shaun A. Delage






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Finch Hype








One of the greatest mistakes one can make in waking reality is to not give a cent of their money to people that need it. The most excuses for not giving include –I need the money, I make very little so I can’t give, the charity only spends it on luxuries etc.
I think you have to be very careful in your life not to end up on the astral plane for eons or in a hell dimension of the astral planes. Many people get there simply because of ignorance let alone actual sins.
When you live in a reality where everyone with any ounce of power or authority is a freemason, you tend to have droves that flock to the fraternity but what a small world it must be when you get to the top and find out there are only about 100 uninitiated people on earth lol all the power and focus of this domain has been to win over those powerful souls over.
We live in a society where you must be hazed to make it anywhere of any prestige. What a sad society, what a sad state of affairs, if only we could have our inherent humanity and dignity and were judged on those qualities rather than how much pain and suffering the power elite can give to others.
I think much of the world revolves with how spiritual an individual can be, I am not saying religious, but spiritually inclined, and there are many faiths and ideologies you can belong too and not be indoctrinated.
Perhaps people that go to church know about it after decades of going, but it is funny these institutions are almost engrained into us from an early age, I bet most people that go after decades have no idea what is going on.
I have been thinking a lot lately about my past because I have been bed ridden and totally ill, so lots of time to think, I think mainly about the cast of characters in my history, and very powerful initiated men, and I have wondered why I am not dead by now lol it is funny but some people with far less circumstances have been knocked off for these lesser reasons.
I think much of my history, is well that history, but naming powerful elites in a paradigm of secrets has its misconceptions, I bet none of them knew I would be able to remember their name after all this time.
But also It is way too late in the game to say delete my manifesto and ask for quiet forgiveness, lol far from it. I believe a manifesto sets one free from further abuse, because it provides an avenue where you name your abusers.
I have garnered enough sensibility and respite from my published manifesto but it allows me in a sense to heal and put closure to everything. It will probably be pointless in a couple decades as far as my own maturation and evolution goes but for the time being I am comfortable with everything I have tried to relay and the people involved.
I think droves of people are under the influence of Christianity and no wonder living in a Christian society but when these mainstream ideologies go around the world with a banner of righteousness then there is something wrong, you don’t see anybody occupying other countries in the name of Buddhism do you lol
Struggling through a life of abuse and pain is a very difficult task, but why sit there and be in pain staring at a wall with a vodka when you can turn your pain into something fantastic and grand, turn your pain into massive amounts of creativity.
This is where true enlightenment rests, and the divine.

-Shaun A. Delage




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Canine Jaw







Well it has been awhile since I have written but I have been recovering from a nasty bug kinda fun !!
I have been non stop into my meditation, I love meditation because it calms the mind totally, and I use it to manifest things, I have been VERY lucky manifesting more things than nature allows.
Manifestation works very slowly and you have to be able to allow it to attract what you need over a gradual amount of time, and it may take several lifetimes. But the sooner you start the better off you will be, not everyone has goals of manifesting great wealth.
Most just use meditation to calm the mind and still racing thoughts and come to some sense of healing in the present. I am somewhat greedy lol after my psychic reading ages ago I came to terms with the fact that I am VERY lucky and to always put myself in positions of life changing decisions.
I think the main thing about manifesting things is, people don’t understand exactly how they will get what they seek, and this should not even be considered. It will happen.
We are in a very chaotic time to be alive, quite a bit has been happening in my country and North America and beyond.
Soon we will get into the Olympics hype again which is one reason I am fortunate to not have a television, and what does one do without TV? Meditate, read, net, dream, listen to music, write, focus, attain and live!
I have been shocked to see that about 4 out of 5 movies I see on Netflix (and shows) have the masonic checkerboard floor on them. It is funny because nobody knows unless you are initiated what it means, but it is everywhere and it is scary. I do also believe that we are in a New world order scenario but it is a soft or friendly new world order. 
I think as the generations progress much of the things we are scared about like microchips and world government and stuff will become mainstream.
It also seems as though we have averted a world war with the Syria thing, but we also have that looming overhead most of the time, and we have the fukishima disaster looming and anything could happen but it is best not to give into the fear based programming and live each day as if it is a gift, only when you have gone down the route of suffering by stocking up on barter supplies and building a fallout shelter do you discover that you yourself are involved in some sort of illusion.
We are always at a precipice of annihilation but that is why you treat every day as a gift that you are alive and breathing as a gift from the divine for your good deeds and you are able to give the gift of your presence to your loved ones for just another day.
Personally I think the end of the world thing died out in 2012, but there are new catastrophes to look out for and new challenges and we all have to stay calm and focused on the ultimate goal, to liberate all beings from suffering and to ascend as an individual, but most of all to personally assist others in their lives to make things easier.
It isn’t easy being human, with sickness, disease, poverty, hunger, suffering, pain, sadness, etc
I am happy that I get to serve my present company, and bring in a new holiday season.
I have had my book on various realms, and nothing no sales, and I do hold the copyright certificate just so you know, I am battling writing more books and getting into that vibe again, I think I was born to write books,  It would be funny for somebody to tell me I am not a writer when I have ten books written lol
Yes so sickness wise, I got a nasty bug and it felt like I was going to die for a few days, and it made me connect with my inherent humanity, so the only thing that kept me alive was buckleys lol
It is quite cold where I am right now, it just chilled across the entire environment, which makes me feel compassion for beings that are not surrounded by warmth like us, like squirrels and deer, that have to live in the cold the whole season.
I put out some pumpkin seeds for our neighbourhood squirrels- I figure it helps them out a bit more.

-Shaun A. Delage




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Tigger nation






Life is all about learning through your mistakes. Most people don’t address their mistakes so they lead a life of heartache. We live in a very tough existence, being alive. It’s almost as if life feels so personal in your own little world, and when you are out in the real world you only feel like a singular fish amongst a school of fish.
Wow what an enlightening past few weeks this has been in my own life, I am back to having a credit card with a low limit, my limit before was $1500 and I couldn’t sustain that amount. I really realised how much you need a credit card in this world, you feel like an alien without one, almost everywhere you turn credit is needed.
I have been doing the final touches to have my book ready including uploading it to sites, and getting the official copyright certificate with the intellectual property office of Canada, designing the cover and doing last tidbits of editing.
I have also bought myself a cool software program to stop all internet gaming, that is my big vice, slots.
It is tough to say you have an issue, but I have revamped my style…after a decade of entering hospital lotteries at $100 a pop I am calling it quits, I have spent about $5000 on em and all I won was a watch.
So now I am going to enter the national lotteries, for those that say I can’t win, I beg to differ there are winners every week and you have to believe you can win. It’s all about manifestation and karma I figure.
So I can enter 50 draws of the national lottery for what a hospital lottery costs, for those unfamiliar with hospital lotteries you basically pay $100 and you can win a house/condo & cash and a few cars
The odds are way better on hospital lotteries vs the national one about 250K vs 12 million
I strongly believe I am on a path however and it would be nice to buy my little piece of the dream.
I have been thinking about my path a lot lately, how paradoxical it is, and how much I have gained.
I feel like I am surrounded in love and light now and exactly what I seek, anyways just wanted to give a small update and wish my blogbuddies a good day

-Shaun A. Delage



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cat pelt






I must apologize for not giving a discourse in the past while, I have been adjusting to the fact that we have a 2013 lol, in ways as well I have been bothered by the impermanent nature of life.
Just near the end of 2012 I lost a dear friend, it happened to be a feline, I adored her, and now some time has passed where I am able to think of the good times, and how much I helped her in life.
True is, furthermore that I will leave this earth. I hope I am old and wrinkled before that happens, but for the life of me can’t imagine that happening to any of my current kin, whom I adore vastly.
Kind of unfair to ask the creator to go perpetually and to allow everyone a permanent place here haha
I think being human is a rather complex undertaking, one many of us never fully think out before we incarnate. It involves a painful complexity per se, we live with things like surgery, rashes, childbirth, cancers, toothache, hunger, abuse, poverty, filth, horror, and pain.
Essentially life is what you make it, and instead of thinking of catastrophe, one can think of how much love, happiness, adoration, beauty, winnings, reward, amazement, courage, trust, and harmony, we have been blessed to encounter in this life, along with everything that comes with the 5 senses.
I think back to my manifesto daily, trying to understand it all, trying to make sense of the cast of characters…trying to define it into one word, conspiracy/illusion/paradox/insanity haha
Me personally I have not had a life blessed with any level of routine or normalcy. It is tough to see the world from my eyes, I wake whenever I can, sleep whenever I can. Lately it has been a bit of both worlds-some daylight some night. So wake at 10 pm go to bed at 11am sorta deal. It is more fortunate than my old schedule of wake at 6pm and go to bed at 7am –I did feel pretty detached from the world then only seeing darkness.
I believe much of my life has been a curse in a sense, but for almost 11 years unemployed with no set routine or schedule and endless hours – I think I could safely say that I have not had one dull moment.
My schedule is a pseudo mish mash of meditation, reading, virtuosity, guided meditation, cooking, cleaning, cat sitting, cat discipline, techno, news, gambling, incense, crystals, isolation, movies, and nature.
I guess what I really wanted to achieve in this life is enlightenment. That I am unsure of whether I am enlightened or not. But at least I have the time, to discover this in myself and the time and essence of a modern day Buddhist monk, without any religious indoctrination or affiliation.
One would think I would be a very lonely person. I would need a catalogue to count my virtual friends. My real life friends however I can count on one hand. – mostly being distant acquaintances but that is the life of a recluse, and an isolationist.
I strongly believe once you get a taste of social energy – you are hooked, almost like heroin. And 99% of society is built to appease this mechanism to the nine, but very very subtle in appearance
Most of our interactions are in public venues, on busses, at work, at lunch, at family dinners, on the street, in squares, in gyms, in restaurants, in malls, in the harbor, at the arcade etc
For a singular consciousness to be permitted some time alone, is a rarity and once a person feels this they begin to alleviate it as much as possible, never allowing themselves to come to term with their spiritual nature, their passions, their essence, their future, or their path.
It is safe to say that most people are comfortable with their path being lead for them, never working with the greater energies to allow their own consciousness to act as a mechanism to guide their way through this dimension or reality.
I can tell you this, I will spend every waking moment I can to assure I know where I am going next, to have an idea of how to lock onto my path and to guide myself to my greatest outcome.
I am right damned scared of letting one minute or one hour waste by not being able to guide my own future or possibility. I am fearful that I haven’t discovered the true answers to all my own inherent questions and this is after a decade of meditations quite a few hours a day.
Truth is, I am most comfortable alone, and in the dark with a candle, I can achieve quite a bit. But I am me, I am not you or your neighbor, or a celebrity. I am just an introvert rave reverend lol
Being surrounded by nature, trees, swamp, rivers, rocks, moss, deer, dogs, grass, rain, snow, mist, fog, sunlight, quiet, peace. It leads me to believe that I am right where I need to be, and however slow the process has been, and however patient I have been in my own path, slow and steady wins the race I figure.
While some 18 year old just got approved for a 10k mastercard, I sit creditless, but starting my savings. Because for once in my life saving a few bucks is important to me, and I want too.
Not going to hoard every dollar I have which is why I am going to give out at least $4-$8 of my money a month in one dollar increments to charities that can use it. If my dollar isn’t important to them then so be it, maybe they will find more worth in somebody that has a thousand to give.
While people are pushing and shoving to get the latest iphone3 (3- I think lol, when will we ever stop caring? - @ iphone 7? How about iphone14? iphone35? Lulz) I have just ended the need to go mobile, and this may seem a bit odd to a telecommunications sales agent, considering they probably haven’t heard somebody say this in months- I don’t need a cell phone, thanks, a landline is enough.
While somebody making $7200 a month would laugh at my $1k budget, simply stating that I am unworthy of their attention, how could somebody live on that little, they must not be trustworthy or fortunate. I only say this, what does a Buddhist monk rake in monthly-weekly-yearly and are you seen as having more worth because you spend $295 on a plate of dinner and wine?
God itself is in the mind, in your own mindset, in your creativity, ur patience, ur giving nature, your love, your compassion, your generosity, and your faith. Most likely working 12,000 x million dimensions over, so it would be tough to assume a physical form of a grandpa with a beard on a cloud.
I have always thought of it as the energy of a quintillion minds or a faculty of divine beings leading the futures of all of us. Exactly what god is to you, is what you are here to discover- most of us cannot, unless we meet somebody with a lil faith. - Faith in the unknown, if you don't discover where your attributes, and your endless qualities are resonant from, who is in charge, and what is guiding all of us to complete enlightenment, you are doing yourself a great dis-service to your path.
-          Shaun A. Delage







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Pickle Calico





What a creative time to be alive, and the reality is manifesting itself as quite a peculiarity lately
Mostly in the news we have things like bodyparts killers, cannibals, austerity and Greece collapsing
For the most part there seems to be a sexuality war on with straights pitted against gays, the religious against the non etc.  I truly believe that we are given many freedoms here and an almost trickery of the gods that run this realm is that if one individual is given many freedoms their mind goes nutz and soon enough you have things like molestation, and murder running rampant
Which is why I theorize that this is a pseudo repository or purgatory of sorts where you are judged and sent off to the lower hell realms or the very very few that are lucky and have divine natured souls, compassion, happiness, etc and have done their lives work get to ascend into the more divine realms
I always question how a god or divinity could allow such atrocities to take place which is why I think that this matrix we are all housed in is this pseudo judging station where everything you do is watched be it by interdimensional orbs or aliens or angels, and you are critiqued based on your actions whether you are fit to ascend or like most who have sold out and contributed trauma and abuse on loved ones and strangers you get to descend to lower more vulgar realms where you belong
Not saying that everyone is going because some youth and teens and kids etc do some pretty stupid things but there comes a time when you are pretty much meant to learn your lessons and move on and if you don’t and continue trauma then of course your soul will not gain entrance into more divine realms where like minded souls exist to perpetuate enlightenment in their existence
It must be brutal to be the one that says descend/ascend but without that authority there would be dimensional chaos and the whole reality or realities would be cast into the hell realms forever more
And most people dream of heaven and a better place where you have a castle and endless money and jewels and love and futurist trains to visit your loved ones
I have no doubt the future is watching us in the present to be able to choose who gets to join them in their enlightened realms but as well the more shady realms and vulgar realms also requisite the nasties into their realms as well which is why we have the spectrum of the black and white squares on the checkerboard floor
Me, I have made mistakes but also around 2005 worked to attain absolution of my sins for perpetuity so that I may feel more content with my existence and this is the glorious work of the divine
Much of life is learning from your mistakes and many of those surrounding me don’t get me, I am pretty simple minded and simple things please me, definitely not materialism
Mind you if I had one hundred million in my savings account I think I would go pretty nuts but most people have to do disgusting things to get that amount of blood money
I strongly feel that I am doing my life’s work by marketing my art movement, however bizarre male art with collage impressions may seem in the moment and writing my novels etc and I know god or divinity laughs at my silly attempts at stardom but at some point the negativity is going to have to lift and I am able to ascend into full liberation
In meditation I always strongly focus on the following words to aid my growth
I ask for power, authority, happiness, wealth, liberation, enlightenment, intelligence, art and love for all beings
I tend to repeat that as a mantra while welcoming those words energy then stop to cycle the earth a few times then move onto metta meditation which is sending your energy out and I do two things,
I send energy to all my relations, no matter whom then close my aura and protect it
Then I also send out things like, negativity, hatred, sickness, anger, suffering, trauma and abuse back to the earth that gave it to me in a grounding cord of sorts to the middle of the earth so that it may utilize that energy for good and to reverse some of the negativity in my being, since I am imprisoned here by gravity and forces I cannot control I feel in essence it is a smart thing to do – to return that negativity to the source that gave it to me and say, no thanks
I am just thankful that my own psychosis manifested itself in the form of nudist Buddhism and not complete grizzly murderous rage and this is a rare thing to be diagnosed with schizophrenia it only affects about 1% of the population of earth but it also carries a scary stigma associated with it. I was horrified when I found out that the greyhound bus head eating murderer was diagnosed with schizophrenia – I was like fuck I would never do that that is disgusting but there are many forms of schizophrenia and there is no cure
I strongly believe that each individual forwards their own enlightenment if they should so choose, if they watch horrors, play disgusting video games and just work as a slave there is no saving them
Thankfully I am stable and sound and have learnt from my mistakes, received proper therapy and catscans and time to reflect in a hospital several times, to me taking my clothes off at an embassy or a Buddhist nunnery seemed normal at the time but it took several hospitalizations and very awesome Canadian care to help me to understand that I have a life long condition and that awareness is sublime
Not to mention I get a lifelong pension for it haha but that is a whole other story all together – but it isn’t easy living on what I live on, it may be a free income but I am left with very little choices or entertainments which is why I take on projects like art or novels or meditation because creativity and expression are free
I am doing things I enjoy and living life on my terms, not having to submit myself for endless indoctrination or exams or whatever and am living in an enlightened state now with no stress and a kind and loving gentle man that loves me as much as I adore him
Peace and beauty seems to be my driving force
-          Shaun A. Delage




Deer Monk






My thoughts of ordaining as a Buddhist monk are mixed, and rather human at this point, first and foremost I would like to be released from my own internal prison structure of karma and psychological operations.  Next I would like to become more versed in a reclusive and enlightened faith. Next the ideals seem to mix with that of a middle aged mandarin female which I probably was in my last life lol
I have decided to post the manifesto for public view but only have this one copy visible through the Church so in a sense my own lil gateway and portal
I am beginning to let go because frankly I think I have the qualities needed of a Buddhist monk and I see Vipassana as kindergarden for monks and I got a taste and rebelled and now I seem to be blacklisted on vipassanas rosters but that is what happens when you accuse a way centre of warcrimes lol
I have learnt from my experiences  enough to warrant me changing my life drastically....while I still seem to be caught on
 the level of a teen or whatever I just cant escape my life and I don’t want it to hit me at middle age that I have done nothing
I want to shine, and give discourses in enlightenment, train under an evolved religion and release myself from the confines of the material world and the matrix and finally make sure I don’t get born into the next vessel as another chav or whatever having to suffer
Maybe my path includes that of being able to preach enlightenment and guide others through suffering
I as well will be suffering, with no hair, nor eyebrows or dinner or snacks or coffee or for example the ability to shave my pubic hair bald lol (it is against the monastic code lolz)
I believe I have the spiritual centre needed to be a monk, living as a lay hermit for like 4 years with barely enough
I wanted so much to be a writer in the world and travel cruise ships but I think I would be a 500 pound writer in no time lol
So in april the Church of Techno may close, and I may move on, but it has been a blast regardless. I have made quite a few friends and even more enemies (lala )
I think it would be cool to be a monk, kind of ironic for me to choose a lineage that concerns itself with Buddhist conservatism haha but I think it will be good for me considering how much of an unstructured and undisciplined life has lead me and look where I am now, lol
Part of me wishes that the internet or my books or second life for example could lead me to a level of happiness. Part of me wishes I could just win a hospital lottery and sit in my lottery house smoking 420 and eating muffins ...part of me wishes by now I have found the right man, a shining prince in beautiful clothing that could say to me one day “you never have to work a day in your life”
Much of me has realized that my power and authority will not take place as a handout but rather a learning experience
That I can hold power and authority without wealth
This is the greatest epiphany to hit recently
Me personally I think I have tested all the other gods to their limits lol the lord Buddha remains the only one standing and smiling back at me
While I have had fun delving into conspiracy, MK ultra and other fascinations
I don’t believe these avenues will offer any level of enlightenment
While part of me wanted to release captivation in totality and get rid of it in my life completely
I honestly believe it can help others
I believe my place in 2012 is to be a forest monk and to retreat to a forest community where I will be accepted and respected. I could think of no other place other than birken forest monastery to live out my days
-          Shaun A. Delage