Being rather infamous is a self defeating prophecy, and nobody can begin to understand your intellectualism in the matter when you say there exists an illusion of choice in life
Then you throw in that you as a being were intoxicated by serious chemicals which made you more influenced by psychic vibration
It would seem being infamous has some drawbacks
I feel okay though because i know whats in store for me, and sometimes i just casually pass the boredom along but other times i wish i would have melded with society a little more
To be influenced by the causality that is running the show rather than oppose it
You understand illusion and you understand your future when you live in an embodiment such as eye
And it is one of the toughest to live in all of the most distasteful beings all rolled into one anomaly
I would have been better off to accept a role in society and work with it
Countless times i think back to my almost death at 15 yrs old and don’t understand how anybody could live through something like that and i almost didn’t, then i think back and the thoughts pervade me that there was a tremendous amount of outside influence and maybe 5% my own
So in a sense i feel somewhat victimized in the matter and then i just only need to be reminded of my own wounds daily to feel the pain ...no 15 yr old would choose to do that and sadly enough many of our young gay youth are being targeted because they hold sometimes superhuman abilities
With trauma you just learn to move on and accept your karma and in a sense the trauma based programming didn’t work on me because i am not perpetuating trauma on others
The oracle said in the matrix that when programs face deletion they choose exile or to return to the source
I guess i am a literal exile within the system and this is how my future is happening and i am okay with that. It almost seems silly to have such a bright individual go to waste but i try and relate in some way that is somewhat normal and then i think back to the drug cocktails i would do much like in fear and loathing in las vegas like 10-12 drugs a night and i wonder how many people out there are actually somewhat normal or able to operate on a normal level
Since i am not really wanting to return to the source i guess i choose exile
The only thing i need is to think of the divine nature and of the creators presence here on earth and beyond and that is all i need to carry me through another day
Many think of humanity as some simple mistake when everything was carefully planned out.
Others think either we are all one or are semi detached from everything
Being in a sense, in a pained existence is yes a self fulfilling prophecy of disaster but one only needs to break out of the ice and out of the world of turmoil and into your talent to achieve your happiness
Many don’t have talent or haven’t discovered their own talent and this is funny because if it was meant to find you it will happen
It may be all laid out in front of you this very moment, it usually is.
So infamy or not you can always come out of any seeming digression through your own state of mind. Typically i use meditation to visualize and actualize my future but also to calm the self and also relieve boredom
What anybody wants is to be entertained away from yourself for another hour but what if the secret to living exists when you look within... You have a nice blanket or shawl and find a quiet place and calm the mind and calm the self, scan the body and visualize your future or your dreams, perhaps some new clothes or something to learn or you want a new job...visualize yourself there
Perhaps you just want to go away to a beach or jungle away from all of this, well do it ! nothings stopping you able to visualize yourself there and out of your red brick place over looking an alley hehe
In a world where your every fantasy is available digitally and visually doesn’t it count for something to actually want to attain a future that is beyond what everyone else is doing?
An ascended state perhaps
And this is what i am reminded of when i think of my history as rather infamous is that i am not a normal person, of course nobody is. But my path is not going to be what everyone else is doing and my future may surprise some and it counts for something to literally put your life on hold to be able to visualize your future and your dreams, you may find you meditate for longer and more time and you have fun with what your doing and not only wish for material things, but things like love, safety, enlightenment and other things that cause you some thought provoking time.
Direction itself is relative to the nature of motivation. The streets are filled with people with struggling layers of motivation. And what is stopping you or i from being on the street and going down that route, not very much and that truth is insanity to some.
In the system we live in it comes down to choices and those that struggle to make choices are left way behind. Many out of frustration could obliterate their own lives but who would choose to do so. Not many, but there are some that choose do it.
The church of techno itself is a mindset of theoretical basis for existence just hovering over a human male. What the church provides is a virtual method of looking around and within your being and interpreting causality, but not to the point of paranoia. Some read these words and are intrigued by the level of introspection so they look further within themselves.
Simply a method to ask questions or at least be able to articulate questions of your surroundings continuously and with a love for self empowerment
So you may be in a meditative trance or you may be making dinner or talking to somebody you don’t like and you constantly analyze the causality of the situation and where its leading you
The actual energy of the church and its inherent visual representation and the rave party surrounding it is happening this very moment around you. You just have to be able to put yourself into the other dimensional rave playing out and in a sense embrace your inherent individualism above all else
That is the actual continuous code that makes you unique because every one of us is unique YES but you walk into a crowd and everyone (hopefully) has the same amount of legs and arms and a face
I mean what is the actual chemical precursor that makes you unique
That is something to go into a meditative trance 4 sure ^.^
I ask my guides to show me the way and what i get is a funny surprise i get a hyena
It took me first to countryside and i had no other choice but to crash a truck i was in and it was sad to have to go through a Thelma and louise sequence and there was no other way out
Next i went to a beach in tahiti and there was a whole bunch of fairground rides and they were coming out of the water it was great and i went into my apartment and showed my crotch to a waiting man who smiled and pointed and i thought slick babe slick
Next went to cruise ship to board the thing and went to a washroom and they started spraying urine everywhere and it was disgusting they wereusing squeegees to really wipe all the filth away it was gross but i made it onto the ship in time for it to set sail
Next i saw an animal that had a horn in the middle of its nose but was more of a horse dog
Next i walked thru a city and the industrial section there was an old ravine and some guy jumped in naked and he had a good body and then i tried to catch a cab and came across a homey G party and one guy fell in front of me on his bike then I won $20,000,000 which was great the fame and fortune pervaded my being
Working with substance yet wanting a theory for being
Morebeing is more substance
But a theoretical life is something to be adored
And a natural rhythm of completeness remains the ultimate struggle
And a self of substance leads out over class for most
Which is sad because with class comes substance
The being involved with so much yet so naive about the timeline
We all struggle and wait for the ultimate in outcomes
To quantify all known life as it is known.
- Shaun A. Delage
