This beautiful Argentinian boy was my best friend Miguel. The last time I met him, he was skinny as never before, wearing a thick coat on a warm spring day, and he couldn’t eat without feeling sick. He insisted that he had coeliac disease. I clearly knew it wasn’t that. Miguel got HIV in 2004, or at least he told me about it that year. I remember that we were walking on the beach when he told me. I was shocked, sad and worried. Miguel was doing fine, he was taking his medicine, going to the gym, travelling, going out, falling in love … until 2011. After always laughing about my spiritual or mystical inclination, hating my tarot cards, my holistic way of seeing the world, suddenly he became crazy about it. And I mean crazy because he stopped taking his HIV medicine. By that time Miguel’s viral load was low, or zero, and he started saying that those pills were killing him and he stopped taking them. He started saying that HIV didn’t exist and even paid for a session with a dissident doctor just to explain that to me. I almost believed it, I must say. Miguel remained well for a few years. Having HIV was such a heavy cross for him to carry until the consequences started to reveal. “Miguel, please, you are going to die if you don’t do something.” I told him that the last time we saw each other. But he denied having HIV until his last breath on December 24, 2018, and taking away with him every desire of celebrating Christmas. Miguel was like a father to my son, the only one who could make laugh until my stomach hurt, he was my first call, for every difficult situation; my closest friend, even though we were living in different countries. I had to tell Miguel’s family what was going on after that last time I saw him so thin and trembling. But it was too late already. He didn’t want to be helped. Sometimes I think it was easier for him to die than to live. He was so intense, too intense. I know he suffered a lot, hiding, lying, being alone. I also know that he enjoyed his life with that same intensity. I love you Miguel. I hope you are having fun somewhere out there 📖 by Ana