Yes the world is chaotic but we can also give it the peace it needs by tuning out all the mind control and chaos and chill for over and hour a lot of my own personal struggles revolve around karma and some choices I made and it seems like 10,000 years have passed by from my jaded history and this is ok to feel not everyone continues on a life of chaos after having a taste of it-some are mature enough to grow from it all I dont begin to know all the answers but I when I was a teenager the world was very different and a crazy time to be alive and my life is very different from what it was 27 years ago now n chaos a life of reflection and calmness as a spiritual leader of a multifaith and had I not gone down the path I did when I was 16 running from police with laptops and undergoing the rituals and interesting scenarios that I did I would not be a guardian and steward of all of us through the new world order and a protective force for good and all that is guiding all of us and what a role to give yourself why take on the pressure ? because I am strong enough not because I want 2 out of ego or fame. SO I have gotten visions of the NWO fight to death realities but I also have visions of a powerful futuristic future as well so whatever reveals itself let it be I feel a lot of stuff will just trudge along in boring nothingness for many years while all the secret sex cult initiates are fighting for the last scraps of fame you can be charting your future here and release yourself from slavery like all the plebs all around you see I did a lot of manifesting and a lot of my life would not change I would probably still live in my middle class area and just buy the whole house instead of 1/4th of it lol but like I dont want to live where all the rich are or do their things or eat their food I will always have my working class upbringing and I have come to terms with how trashy they all can be in their fake lives not my cup of tea I would just pursue my goals more I think like getting all my art in a printed volume set x10 and I was trying to envision what 20,000 pages looks like lol or since I have 5000 books or so I could get them all printed and have a library of my own occult books and it’s like where would I put 5000 books lol some of them would be smaller and some not print easily so safe to say I would be left with about 4000 books hahaha just would come in handy at some point I figure in the future would be fun to take that on along with getting 20,000 domains I researched but I would not wear a $20,000 shirt when people are homeless or cats are being abused I would want to make sure I help a few of those charities out but also making sure that with a windfall I continue to have an income so that I can always help at least make a small dent in hunger or poverty in my area like its not always about money and donating what if every month you sent $5000 in food you personally picked out for your local foodbank that you yourself would love to get if you were poor like capers and dark chocolate fermented beans cheeses canned meats and luxe stuff like oils and vinegars and stuff to really help you that would make me feel so good but you just get some boxed stuff and a few cans of soup and yeah expected that that will last for 6 weeks. recently I undertook to start employment then kind of made the decision to resign a lot of it was the heat and going all over town travelling unpaid 2 hours there and back along with 2 hours of paid work and I found the work to be kind of degrading like it comes with the territory as a house cleaner but my last gig for a rich lady she started saying a lot of stuff in code riddles and stuff that I am used to and I just quit mid shift I wont take that shit from anyone speak in proper english not in riddles or MK ultra phrases ---its just I would rather be doing something were I am kind of my own person not just something to be ordered around by people I would rather work for free endlessly because I value myself higher than that but like I just cant handle 9-5 like everyone else I was born to be an artist and things are pretty comfortable for me right now but if the going gets tough in my area or for me I have a lot of skills now I can depend on and this was part of it -I set myself up for unrealistic expectations of myself for employment kind of a do or die situation stoked along by donald trumps threats like well I may not have my disability so better get cracking but i failed to see my own limitations for hard work also my extreme challenges I have with socializing and relating to people and also some of the issues I face like my mental illness and side effects of my meds that make that life almost difficult or unattainable but if pushed into it all by forces I can’t control I think I will really thrive because I have no choice just a lot of stuff to think about but for the time being my bills are paid so that I can give as much art as I can to the world - I have a family that loves me, and doorcats to feed that adore me and a house to support a religion to nurture and endless gay blogs to express myself and I have to remember to slow down sometimes -these days I do really well at tuning stuff out for an hour once and awhile like 20 years ago when I started manifesting I was doing it 5 hours a day now I find I barely have to do it every few days for less than an hour and there is so many methods to manifest not just visualizing but doing a budget of what you want to achieve - wealth videos lottery affirmations including positive and confidence but also that aspect I touched on is calming everything down for an hour to listen to music that has a tremendous effect and also making sure you have money to buy the lottery tickets to win your millions or buy the food that rich people eat so you can dream or pay for the shirt that will eventually get you a job interview to look good in or a tool that can help you win the lottery yourself like lottery tarot cards and actually have your system printed up for your own use hahahaha but it goes deeper than that - it about managing what you have now let me tell you they wont give billions of dollars to someone that cant even manage $2000 or is riddled with like 10-15 addictions all playing out at all times, unless you battle everything one by one you are always going to be looking at people that have things with envy but if you did the work to cut your 5 major addictions down to 2 then down to zero like imagine how much money you would have if you did not have to support 5 addictions lol samsaric existence is terrifying but when you realize this whole fantastic scenario is playing out in your brain only this whole reality and world and you now have power.