we are so mean to ourselves for decades I am like well I am just a huge weirdo who stays at home all day and hates people has other species as best buddies haha kind of kewl but like I was thinking of it all in a negative sense even though I manifest and use affirmations and on tons of meds like I tend to be so critical of how I appear etc and what choices I make its just when there is an eternity of the hell dimensions at stake its like um not gonna make one wrong choice like if you are a super perved out freak gay and sadistically hunting like super-twinks the before 17/18 yr olds type of nastiness its like u gotta be careful and nobody tells people about the vigilante group kreep catchers and others its like ur whole fucken millionaire illustrious life could fucken fizzle and die out in an instant with one wrong choice (its fucked up all around but like they kind of had it coming for being so fucked in the head) but like not my cup o tea I am not even sexual with anybody (like beautiful peoples 18-29 lmao) but like to get me out of my funk I just remind myself I own 5 galleries - a graphic design studio - 21 blogs -2.5 books -audiobooks etc - have done 17,000 pieces of art and have won around $70,000 in stuff since I started contesting and light a bit of sai baba sandlewood and just be at peace with everything hahaha were kind of engrained in our core selves that being a gay male is somewhat wrong or negative or false or whatever when it could mean you are chosen to be apart of one of the most vulnerable communities for a reason