Ugh snapped at a lady today I dont really care she was being pretty snarky she kind of deserved it and she gets paid for all the stress she has to deal with I dont !!! I have to recognize that I am vulnerable and not even scott free from quiitting smoking yet even at 3.5 months its just I am sick of people stepping on me or being nasty I am just gonna be assertive and put them in their place I dont really care anymore- I am paying them they can deal with it was trying to get some lottery tix cashed in for new ones for the draw but she kept adding extra to it which was a dollar or more each draw when I tried to correct her she started to get that nasty tone with me and I was like fuck this I just said madamme if you cannot even be a cashier I dont know what you should do lol and her supervisor said hold on a minute no need to get angry let me help you no matter what he did either the machine kept adding a dollar so who knows what was going on really but I was getting nowehere with her no matter the 3 times I tried to spell it out for her simply like a child would understand so I was trying my best in a super weird situation I know what it should cost- I guess- I just need more patience sometimes its just I rarely go out into the world and I am boiling over from wearing so many layers its just dont test me assholes they make $20 every hour to help 'difficult' customers like me -deal with it- get a therapist I just felt like saying madamme it takes a lot to piss me off because I am buddhist lol its like I could never be employed full time so I am always kind of jealous of these people who think you are going to hit them if you raise your voice or be assertive its like just cash my $20 in what the hell is the problem lady? lol she will remember me all day lol I am usually pretty calm its just a few things prior to the drug store really threw me out of whack I was like not going to have any of it -it was not ideal but I eventually got it solved just not gonna be the sweet buddhist everyone likes anymore I used to solve my stress with a ciggarette and now have like zero coping skils so deal with it lol