animalia rock

What is reality, but a mass  of more questions

Many people look at their present moment reality as being non existent because they hold a basis for identity either in the past or the future

I am somewhat guilty of holding onto the past as well

And the Buddhists will make you believe that there is nothing but the present moment reality

I am sorry to say but the most enlightened religion on earth has flaws, but it is the leading contender in my books because it is always ever evolving as opposed to stuck in the past like many other faiths not just the past but supposed thousands of years ago

I look around in my present moment reality and i am shocked by what is being presented

I know that much of my family and relations are illusions although i attach to them quite easily because of that history

But i wonder about myself being surrounded by people that don’t actually have the power to listen to you or your words, just endlessly programming you with their code

To tiring ends

Then i am on a neuro medicine that affects my brain called risperidone for my schizophrenia

It also causes insomnia and other things but for the most part it helps me not confuse my realities which i think aids me, and in no way do i advocate stopping medications or anything like that...god no

Most of us need them and thankfully we have them because without them much of us would die from danger or health difficulties

i also have my first ever sexual encounter with a guy looming over me, it was on a military base amidst much drama. because i live across the street from a military base and also i look out my window and can see the nautical canada USA border so essentially with these subliminal reminders  I question myself and whether i am actually gay.

I know for a fact i am not bisexual or straight

I know now that i am not celibate

If i was to pick and choose a sexuality of course i would choose being a gay man but there is some fundamentals i don’t agree with in gay society and the trauma instituted on me by the gay community and closeted gay men

So i think for the time being because i don’t have my soulmate with me or any other substance with a sexuality i am comfortable being asexual

Mind you there is also a virtual sexuality with me, and with much of the people in second life that have marriages virtually but that goes undefined.

I feel it is the safest mode of life considering what is at play against me currently

I feel alot of gay society are just automatons of the culture endlessly repeating gay etiquette and attaching to pointless baseless and substanceless ideologies

TOP / BOTTOM  well if there is a disinterest in most of the culture what would make them think i would choose a cultural title for my private areas

Part of me believes i can have a relationship without the obsession of sex and i have had people treat me with shock and awe when i said i was somewhat celibate

They don’t understand the enigma i inhabit and a few causalities of wanting to be celibate or asexual

The first one has to be my involvement in the sex industry and the sometimes violent encounters i had with closeted psychopaths
...and the next is the power sexual encounters i had to go through involving very high ranking reptile people
...the next is my religious vocation although i don’t deny myself sexual pleasure i actually enjoy it ......the next has to be the fear of sexual infections and diseases....... the next has to be what i understand is peoples literal obsessions with sexual activity and they would literally murder their own family rather than give up the orgasm state ..........the next has to be the fact that i have alot of astral and spiritual sexual encounters which i enjoy so i have sort of a celestial sexuality as well ..........then next is my medication i am on kinda ads to the disinterest in sexual stuff but not so much that i deny myself pleasure just so much that i in a sense would be disinterested in pleasing a partner other than my soulmate..... The next has to be that i have had a history of abuse........ The next has to be that i have done ALOT of drugs some nights doing up to twelve caps of xtacy in one night and other times doing a cocktail like ketamine, xtacy, GHB, shrooms etc...... Plus there is much more that is hidden that i am unaware of but much of this could be solved by talking it through with somebody i love or settling on something fun like lets be together but we don’t have to go the whole way or whatever

The trauma state exists in my mind and i have serious difficulty accepting the fact that there was no past and no future only present

But the only thing you can put your faith in is the present

If you constantly live in the present moment without time and work to resist peoples programming you endlessly you will not age what i mean by this is the lifetime is a span of 70 years or so and every day is filled with thousands of lines of code that is meant to instil the grand paradigm onto you which essentially is a great old grey haired wise person that needs to be wheeled around and spoonfed

If you resist this programming it will be impossible to age because if you don’t believe in age or time you will not age along with the rest of people and here lies the fountain of youth

But also along with that is giving yourself a bunch of whole and filling and nutritious and sometimes not so good for you carbs and food

Also taking care of your good looks by cleaning yourself regularily

But most of all loving your being how it is. Not working to constantly alter your appearance

Sure it is nice to go to the gym and workout but it may also hinder your spiritual growth somewhat by adding to ego complexities and you develop such a super ego that you workout 5 times a week and go have sex twice a day with a stranger then god knows what else would happen

Let me share a story of what happened to me about a week ago

I was yawning and i developed a facial spasm in my neck and chin, it was disheartening i freaked out and it reminded me that we are more delicate that you can even imagine

That it is wise to appease your divine nature every chance you get because everything could be taken away in an instant

Anyways some hours passed and i go workout like fun yay i go in the locker room and might i add i saw the HOTTEST twink alive he was like 19 years old reddish hair perfect body and well everything else was in order lol   anyways some older men some of them obese came in obvious cultists or reptiles i dunno and they were talking in a psychic reverberation sequence about how this lady got esophigal cancer and her whole throat swelled up and they made sure to say and she was in a mental hospital as well and they looked at me.

This reminded me that there is this sauris people in charge. That there is a luciferian mind that owns the title to this domain. They use threats to mainly ensnare people into these cults and it is sick because people literally are pushed into these figurative death cults by blackmail and through subliminal suggestion and definitely not on their own free will

You choose to be surrounded by power animals, and guardian angels or you choose to be surrounded by these twisted sauris’s that choice is essentially up to you whether you want to spend an eternity in this place or navigate the countless dimensions after you are permitted exit from this domain

but there is something else out there  as well that prefers not to be seen because it is very far away and can only be accessed through your mind, guardians and other beings and that is DIVIINITY

I can tell you that while the opposite may be tempting and there are those that are trapped with no hope of escape i also say that there is always a way out, that you are never trapped here or anywhere

That you are essentially free.

That you are a divine entity and you must work to embrace that quality in others no matter what spectrum causality you belong too

I was revamping my captivation piece recently because i now believe the colton harris moore stuff was a secret weapon for me to send my life story to various entities anyways and i kind of thought to myself

Well definitely my rights and freedoms have been violated as a canadian citizen

My fundamental human rights have been violated

I have been experimented on , sexually assaulted, tortured in foreign countries and i am programmed endlessly and i am a virtual prisoner here without the one thing i crave most and that is LOVE

But i am still here as a sovereign entity that when called can be a visual and almost feline looking representation of ultimate love and sacrifice and to me that matters

A universal philosopher of ultimate reality

I work to attain the ascension i crave not only selfishly for myself but for my disciples and my friends

(my family remains ignorant to my struggle, but that is their choice really)

So i am alone and with a virtual family and a virtual church that touches dozens a day and in that i find comfort

One thing i laughed about is the notion of a lawsuit

Where do i begin i almost laughed and how deep does the rabbit hole go and if called to trial where would this all begin and where would it all end?

Witnesses and records would be overflowing and essentially if it does happen i am ready

For the time being there exists a great war to trap me, and quadrillions of dollars would be spent to ensnare my singular soul

That by definition the wikileaks and the matrix movies were created for me solely to ensnare my soul in a singular fractalized reality

But that is another philosophy talk altogether

I don’t retain the exclusive rights however but if you look at it in a transpersonal method or a fractalized dimension where you are the ruler of an entire galaxy elsewhere it all begins to fall into place

One only needs to feel the ‘pleasurable sensations’ throughout the body to remind their being that they are never forgotten here. We are with you. Divinity is here and it is coming to surround you with its nature at all times. Even in darkness.

.

I ask my guide to show me the way

What i got was a nice surprise it was a heron these are beautiful birds with very long legs for walking through water and grass

It took me to a place where i was racing in a track and it looked like a video game interface it turned out it was reality or a blend of both

There was a host that really scared me, it was a man that i didn’t know if he had a lower half of his body but he only had one arm and looked like he was from down in southern US he was holding a dripping bbq sandwich

I tried not to focus on him too much they were critiquing my driving i was causing accidents everywhere

You could choose where to race like rural rode or city and there was a camera crew following you wherever you chose

I got in so many accidents that they were hauling me away

Thankfully the heron took me to my next placement i was at a rec centre and came across a towel with a dozen or so crystals on it and i picked about ten that i liked and they were transmuted elsewhere

They were huge crystals and would have cost about $1000 each in our dimension they were all shapes and sizes

Then this deviant kid came by and started going to the bathroom on them i got so mad i told a lady that worked there and she slapped him and she packed the lil bastard into a van and the kid vanished and me and her started to smoke some marijuana we drove 500 miles away and we had just enough to call mommy and daddy on this lil kid but he was nowhere in sight and the lady sparked a dube and she liked me because i could read the icons on a computer and understand the sounds that it made i told her that we are all on some microprocessor somewhere operating on one of billions of earths and she said believe it i told her there was virtually no way to escape the rules of this dimension and she agreed with me and i told her that i must learn to work with them

Next the heron took me with a motorcycle racing group we were travelling there was stuff we were driving through called bonus rounds which made us alot richer when we drove through the big hollow squares people in my group were getting injured all round

I went into a bakery in a wheelchair to pick some stuff and settled on a cinnamon pretzel but the girl broke it in pieces then i got up and ditched the wheelchair and went looking for pastries and passed some guy who shouted to people do you have any gay friends and i shouted out you just made one lol

Next the heron took me to a city neighbourhood where a body of a woman had been dumped by a guy in the back of a building and tons of people were going to look and i went with them to go look and i was on the phone with police and i saw a police garbage truck drive by

I looked right at the body in the crowds of people and it had a shoe that was off

I walked behind the building and a guy drove by in full motorcycle gear but you could peddle it like a tricycle lol i thought he was the killer so i had to hide myself in the snow to escape being seen by him and all i could think of was the compass and square and was scared that i would be next

Where does causality take you

And for most it takes you nowhere

But a world of neglect and the realisation

that there is no path

essentially it is those with an actual path

that many are deathly envious of

the fact that your consciousness is no longer decided by you alone

but a full on faculty of the smartest minds in the UNIVERSE

-Shaun A. Delage